Konnichiwa, rainbow warriors!

It's Wednesday in Japan already, so get a load of this thing.

This is the Masters Collection MC-A030RB. But from here on out I'm going to call it the Rainbow Ninja Knife, and you can guess why. This knife is all about the ninjas, and wants to make triple damn sure you know it's all about the ninjas, too. It's ninjas for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Ninjas in your face. Ninjas all the way.

Ostensibly this is a regular spring assisted folder. Its construction is completely metal through and through -- I assume the handle scales are cast zinc or something -- and thus weighs a whopping 194 grams (6.84 ounces). It's 8-1/8" long open with a 3-1/2" blade and a roughly 2-7/8" usable edge. It's 5/8" thick but feels even bigger in the hand, probably due to a girthy 1-3/16" width and high profile pocket clip, and aided by its very, very greebly design.

The blade is a pseudo-dagger shape, but owing to the side folding layout that leaves about 1/8" of the spine exposed, only one side is actually sharpened. It's not sharpened very well, mind you, and the edge geometry is precisely as whacked as expected. But the blade has got a giant finger hole in it, which should more than make up for it.

The Rainbow Ninja's styling is just full bore bedlam. All over the walls, floor, and ceiling. The more you look at it the better it gets, because you keep finding more and more details. Like this shogun styled pocket clip, picked out in gold.

Then, of course, there's this bloke. He's depicted on both sides, and to make sure you know he's a ninja he's wearing the full set of pajamas, he's holding a kunai, and he's got a sword. With two more kunai strapped to his leg. On a background of shuriken. In case you didn't get it, he's even labled in a cartouche: The top glyph is the kanji for "ninja" ("shinobi," actually) while the bottom one is either gobbledygook so overstylized I can't identify it.

The pivot pin head is styled. Of course, it also says "shinobi."

The heel contains an obligatory glass breaker. The corners of the relief are more kunai.

The blade is deeply embossed on one side with this. "Shinobi" again.

The reverse is more lightly etched with the Masters Collection logo, and the inscription "Shogun Rei." or "Ret?" "Rex?" Again, it's stylized and hard to tell. Beneath this is written, near as I can figure, "將軍今." Which translates semi-literally to "shogun now." Which might be a decent name for a band, but I have no idea why it's written here.

It comes in a box.

Surprisingly, the reverse contains some legible and actually coherent text for a change and isn't just chock-a-block full of ridiculous Engrish. It instructs you to ask your local or other online retailer for other Master Collection knives, or Master Collection ballistic knives. Really? Sign me the fuck up!

Well, I went and found Master Cutlery on the internet, and while they do have a comprehensive web site ("The Largest Variety In The Wholesale Knife Industry!") I couldn't find squat on there about ballistic knives. Which is a bummer. But I did find the product listing for this very knife, which includes a couple of details. For instance, the blade is alleged to be made of 3Cr13, which may or may not be accurate. But they also specify the blade profile as "sheepsfoot," so maybe we should take all of the published specs with a grain of salt. It lists the theme as "Everyday Carry" and specifies a "SCULPTED NINJA ART HANDLE."

Yes. Yes it is.

Curiously, they also consistently render "Masters Collection" with no apostrophe, I guess indicating the presence of multiple masters doing the collecting, and not the collection of any one singular particular master. Now we know.

The Inevitable Conclusion

I would normally suggest that a knife like this might be suitable for cosplay or something, but I don't think that quite describes the level of object we're dealing with, here. The Rainbow Ninja isn't part of a costume -- it could be an entire raucous costume all on its own. It says right on it everything that needs to be said about itself, and then some. It's stupid, it's ostentatious, and it's probably not actually made very well. But damn it, I love it.

Now: ninja vanish!