Yeah. Honestly, 99% of the time my kid is having a fit, it's because he's hungry. I never yell either. Never have and probably never will (barring seriously dangerous things that need to immediately stop).

After a couple months of feeding him when he's upset, watching him calm down, apologizing if I angered him and then asking him if maybe he was so angry because he was really hungry, now he'll actually tell me mid-fit that he's really hungry. Or sleepy, scared, etc. Talking basic needs, not just hunger.

Honestly I'm really happy. The emotional maturity of a toddler that can recognize that in large part his anger is being hungry it's pretty cool.

I enjoyed reading this, but I don’t like the idea of lying to kids either. So my daughter is a poor sleeper. I could tell her that if she makes loud noises at night, the monsters who have very good hearing will find her in the dark and take her away. No, the world is scary enough without monsters.

You know what’s worse than feeling angry? Feeling angry and also feeling guilty about it, because it’s an invalid feeling that needs to be suppressed. Anger isn’t all about losing control. It’s about trying to express that something isn’t working for you. The first step in making it better.

But yeah hitting is not helpful.