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Selfhosted
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Defederation isn't sabotage. It's a feature for healthy communities. Anyone that is interested in discussions on either defederated community, will create an account for both.
And that is the reason why reddit is still growing. If you are required to make multiple accounts just to engage with the communities you want to engage with, Lemmy is no better than separate forums. And those all got overshadowed by reddit for a reason.
Lazy users is why Reddit blotted out individual forums.
There is an interesting op-ed adressing the 'issue' of 'lazy users': https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2023/06/op-ed-why-the-great-twittermigration-didnt-quite-pan-out/
Either way, you won't convert anyone by attacking them. If you want Lemmy to be able to replace proprietary social media platforms, which is something I want, you have to meet the users' expectations. The expectation for Lemmy is a Reddit-like experience. But with the fracturing of Lemmy into instances that block each other, normal user will simply stay on Reddit.
Really mobile apps need to make multi-account easy, problem solved.
I still like individual forums and use them on occasion. For me, the reason why Reddit was better is because of the UI. The default phpBB skin is awful for following a dialog in my opinion; Reddit's much more compact threads free of annoying signature blocks and giant user profile panels is much nicer. Personally I'd be perfectly happy to go back to the days of individual forum accounts if the forums had nice UIs like Reddit or Lemmy. Even Flarum is an example of a traditional forum software with a decent UI. The big missing thing though is threaded conversation which I much prefer over a flat forum, something that Lemmy offers.
Honestly, for anyone not particularly tech literate it's a bit confusing. It's got Lemmy in the name. It's the same UI. Most are going to wonder why they're suddenly logged out or why they need another account. It's not intuitive if it's not something you're particularly used to.