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How many Lemmy users are non-technical background?
(programming.dev)
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I can absolutely see your point about not fitting in to a gender role. I think many people in technology felt something similar growing up, way before computers were popular. They were considered geeky and people who used them were strange and a bit weird. Absolutely not popular.
It hurts to be treated that way, because you just want to be yourself. And I understand that feeling very much myself. It's the same when you are ugly by the way. Life is completely different when you are ugly compared to when you are beautiful. It's just a different world because every single person will treat you differently. But sorry, that's me going on a tangent...
It makes sense that when you feel like that, you want people to stop treating other people like that.