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I'm not running nextcloud myself, but have you checked that the database settings are scaled to match your server's resources?
yeah i use mariadb with it and messed with the config but still nothing more than maybe 1 second same with enabling caching with redis and editing the php config i did get it down from 3-4 minutes though so thats something
What CPU / RAM / DISK resources do you have allocated?
4 cores 8GB ram and 500GB i looked at a resource monitor and the cpu barely hits 10% when im trying to load ages and the server is running other things
Next thing that comes to mind is web server settings / threads / workers. But I'm afraid I can't help you more since I'm not familiar with Nextcloud.
yeah i have increased them to the recommended settings and tried adding some but still cant get it to constantly load under a minute. i would put it down to the server being 100s of miles from me but even my server running in house is slow