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this post was submitted on 07 Feb 2024
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Asklemmy
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I survived a drug induced coma and since then my brain just misses a lot of cells. I once had a pretty high IQ and nowadays I can be happy I remembered to take my pills in the morning. The most I can do is a low level sysadmin job, for everything else I basically lack the brains.
It's not really something I have experienced in a past tense, I experience this shit every single day. Hate to be ridiculed for my bad memory especially. My coworkers don't know that and regularly make fun of me.
Oh man, that sounds terrible. It's one thing to be at that intelligence, but to know you used to be smarter and just ain't anymore sounds horrifying. Can I ask is it a memory thing or do you legit feel less intelligent?
I don't only feel less intelligent, I am less intelligent. My IQ dropped about 20%, which is noticeable by everyone including me.
The most annoying thing is that it feels like my brain is underclocked. Some Ritalin helped for a while with that but I had to stop taking it because of the risk for sudden death in conjunction with my other meds and conditions, which is something I wouldn't like to experience.
However even with enhancing drugs I still am not the 80% which my IQ test says, I feel more like half of what I used to be. It's really detrimental to self worth knowing that I used to be smart and now I'm "just average" even though years of therapy told me it's OK to be average.
I can imagine! It's like an athlete getting lame. They can still function but not at the level they're used to. Others might not be able to understand this loss as they see them just being on their level
Oh wow, that's a pretty cool analogy. Stealing that :D
They even sometimes tell me how smart I am and that… triggers me even more. Bitch, I'm dumb, if you think that's smart you really offend me. Deep down I know that they mean well and think they're giving me a compliment, but it still stings.