147
submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by tattletaletimes@lemmy.world to c/theonion@midwest.social

There’s a up-and-coming political star that is making waves on the local level, 5-year-old Jerry Manders from Chicago, Illinois, has been identified as a lying prodigy with a skill set so advanced that he is already being hailed as a future star in American politics.

“Yes, I did my homework last night,” Jerry fibbed to his kindergarten teacher earlier this week, not knowing that this precise moment would set him on a path to future public office. Jerry, who had instead spent the prior evening watching toy unboxing videos, showcased a remarkable aptitude for deflecting blame, disarming his opponents with confusing rhetoric, and a natural talent for lying constantly—all foundational skills in the political arena.

https://tattletaletimes.com/index.php/2023/09/01/jerry-manders-5-year-old-prodigy-liar-already-hailed-as-future-political-star/

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] theodewere@kbin.social 3 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

he's always been a prodigy.. by the time he was 3 Jerry had already figured out that if you stick to the lie, Mommy will eventually get tired and give you another cookie..

this post was submitted on 16 Apr 2024
147 points (96.8% liked)

The Onion

4504 readers
882 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS