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Fatherly hazing
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 07 May 2024
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Aww cry more about it. I'm an LGBTQ refugee that fled Russia. Most of my life I've lived under the constant very present fear of deportation, death or at least homelessness, just to hold on another day. What's worse is I fled to the UK, which looks more and more like Russia every day.
Very little bothers me personally and if anything I have developed an unhealthy habit of thriving on conflict, but that doesn't prevent me from empathising with others and seeing how some things affect people differently.
It's called going outside and touching grass and realising people have different contexts for things and that the world is very harsh and parents need not pile on that shit for a kid who may already have trust and confidence issues and viewing things systemically - using actual critical thinking - rather than simply humble bragging about how "tough" you are and how everyone else must be thin skinned and weak.
It's a slippery slope to reactionary thinking of "good" and "bad" people and that makes it way worse than just macho posturing. I hope you can see my perspective but good day either way.
And nowhere in there did you touch on how sending a kid to the store for striped paint could somehow cause trauma, rather than teach a valuable lesson about gullibility, critical thinking, and being able to laugh at one's self.
Not everything in this world is as serious as escaping a country to avoid punishment or death for who you are. Having the emotional intelligence to differentiate between the serious and light hearted is something a person should develop when they're young or life will be much harder for them.
Because it was already stated in the thread: parents shouldn't lie to their children to take advantage of their trust to teach them that trusting them leads to them set up for embarrassment and that they're an idiot. Idk how this isn't obvious but I guess beating kids was acceptable and reasonable too.
That's absurd, what's funny and light-hearted to one is usually at the expense of another (in this case), and sans reading their mind, you have no idea how they feel about your "just banter bro",, you're just assuming this because you have no ability to imagine that anyone at any time might feel differently to you and you're scared to confront that idea.
I'm not saying that harmless playful teasing is impossible or should be banned, but this doesn't really come off as that, and the experiences ITT don't either, especially with descriptions of such things as "hazing" which often also includes things that are without question just violent abuse/bullying.