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this post was submitted on 10 May 2024
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Looks at ballot.
"Is carbonite, like...an actual thing? Can I be frozen like Han Solo? I have a little bit of money saved up. Which stupid tech bro startup can do this for me?"
"Sorry, best I can do decomposing cryogenic plug of fluids"
Let's ask Ted Williams's frozen head. What do you think, Ted?
Ted Williams's frozen head: ...
Thanks Ted
Turns out those rich fuckers currently being scraped off the sides of their cryochambers had the right exit strategy all along.
Alcor is generally considered your best cryonics bet right now. Not a great bet, but your best bet.
I don't have carbonite but for the right price I can pack you into a freezer filled with ice. That should do the trick.
Shut up and take my doge coins!