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Anon can't find a good match
(sh.itjust.works)
This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
Vagina exploded?
Yeah, I feel like anyone giving OOP the benefit of the doubt is overlooking that part.
I'm equally as concerned about "too much birth control"
How the fuck does that work?
These guys think birth control is some sort of magic evil mind control pill.
Once in a while on the relationship/sex forums you see women making posts like "My boyfriend lost his mind that I masturbate and said having any kind of pleasure or happiness at all is akin to cheating and is currently beating me while I make this post, reddit is this normal?" or "My boyfriend is jealous of my tampons and demands that I never touch my vagina with anything and has locked my pelvis in a 16th century iron chastity cage, reddit how can get him to marry me?"
This is the kind of guy who thinks vaginas can be reshaped by putting things in them, but also doesn't seem to think by the same logic that his dick should have become a long, thin noodle by now.
What does that even mean?
Probably implying a large labia minora.
I'm which case, that has nothing to do with masturbation
He could mean a big 'ol hole, which, tbh I'm not a scientist and it could be that jamming the biggest bad dragon you can find up there may affect it in a similar way a similarly sized baby would, BUT also the absolute classic movie Mean Girls leads me to believe that some people just naturally have "a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina."
Oh look you're dumb as fuck when it comes to women's bodies too.
No u lololololol
Due to clandestine dildo usage, as opposed to overt dildo usage?
Isn't it cool how many red flags he managed to sneak into that one sentence?
The fact that he used the word "clandestine" makes it sound like he convinced himself she must have a secret dildo she was using to destroy her genitals, because a 13 year old boy told him that's how vaginas work and he never grew out of it.
It's really easy to imagine him being the problem. He decides she has a secret horse dildo hidden away somewhere, accuses her of it repeatedly and when she tells him to fuck off, decides she is "cluster b" for having reasonable reactions.
4chan will not help this person.
Everyone knows if you hide it, it becomes highly unstable.
If you suddenly observe it while using it the wave function collapses and you don't wanna see how that ends.
The dildo being a wave-function basically exists as a sphere of all possible angles and orientations, what's more, the closer you look at it, the more likely it will teleport into your neighbor's kitchen.