Like woah… woah. Can we just take a minute to appreciate how long the Battle of Verdun was? 9 months, 3 weeks and 6 days. At the start of the battle, you could’ve made beautiful sweet love to a woman, impregnated her with your seed, and dropped a few more loads in her in the mean time, and then 9 months later that baby comes out and the battle would still be going on. That says something about humanity. I’m going to repeat that. That. Says. Something. About. Humanity. In this 10 pg, double-spaced essay, I will talk about how awesome Verdun was and why we should be naming our children after it.