146
My lib friend, unprompted, posted this bullshit
(hexbear.net)
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Then you take a closer look at the chicken and turns out the thing is rotten, also full of glass and completely unsafe for consumption, so not any better than the other option, you'd be just as sick either way. And so, you logically decide to not take either of these option and after looking the rest of the cart up and down you settle on a bag of peanuts sitting in a compartment bellow the main 2 options, not the best but at least it's actually comestible.
But before you can grab the bag of peanuts the passenger just in front grab your arm to stop you. The man has a costume vest, shirt and necktie on top, a baggy pant maintained by strings of bad quality fabric and white socks in flip-flops, your eyes briefly settle on the pins on his fedora, you notice the oh too familiar one displaying a smiling chicken with a shit eating grin full of human teethes and growl mentally in annoyance as the man stare you down with a smug look off superiority and disdain and begin telling you the same thing these types all says every single time:
"You can't take the peanuts you fool! You need to take the chicken!"
You roll your eyes not even bothering to hide your annoyance this time.
"It's rotten and full of glass shards, I can't eat that"
"Yeah but at least it is actual food unlike the platter of shit with broken glass. Or would you rather have more airline companies serve crap with shards of glass? Because that's what you're encouraging by buying peanuts!"
"How the heck does taking peanuts encour-"
"THAT'S JUST HOW 2 DISHES TRAYS WORKS, DON'T QUESTION IT AND CHOOSE STRATEGICALLY IF YOU DON'T WANT EVERY SINGLE DISH TO BE REPLACED WITH LITERAL SHIT!!"
"Even if that was somehow true, rotten chicken isn't any better."
"HOW DARE YOU SAY IT'S NOT BETTER?! HAVE YOU NOT SEEN THESE SCARY SHARDS OF GLASS? AND BESIDE I'M SURE THAT THE GLASS SHARDS IN THAT SHIT ARE MORE SHARP THAN THOSE IN THE CHICKEN AND YOU TOTALLY CAN DIGEST ROTTEN CHICKEN UNLIKE SHIT I'VE READ IT SOMEWHERE WHICH MEANS -"
Here you go, another fool to berate you all flight for daring not wanting to experience food poisoning. This flight is gonna be a long one.
I'm impressed by how accurate this is