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submitted 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) by naevaTheRat@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/vegan@lemmy.world

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Things I've learned since going vegan

  • You can slice someone's throat and still love them.
  • The word "need" can also mean "could easily live without but do kinda want".
  • The word "humane" can mean literally anything you want it to.
  • It's ok to call people out for harmful behaviour unless that behaviour involves bacon.
  • Plants definitely feel pain and lawns scream when you mow them.
  • Crop workers are exploited but slaughterhouse workers definitely aren't. No exploitation here, no sir.
  • Meat is the only food that contains protein.
  • "Found the vegan" is still funny and original the millionth time.
  • Before humans came along, cows were just wandering around with massive udders praying for someone to invent industrialised agriculture.
  • Steak is cheaper than beans, rice, pasta, and canned vegetables.
  • While 99% of all meat comes from factory farms, no one eats that meat.
  • Everyone only buys local, organic, humane, Dalai Lama approved meat.
  • Everyone has an uncle who owns a farm straight out of a 1950's Americana magazine
  • Everyone has a degree in nutrition and evolutionary biology.
  • Everyone knows that one guy who went vegan and almost died.
  • Everyone is free to talk about their identity, beliefs and interests without being shamed for them. Unless they're vegan. Vegans can fuck off.
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[-] SolarPunker@slrpnk.net 6 points 6 months ago

I understand the intent but I don't think this way of communicating is very effective if not accompanied by comedy.

[-] naevaTheRat@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 6 months ago

You don't think this list is comedy? Baffling!

this post was submitted on 27 Jun 2024
25 points (67.6% liked)

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