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That's your problem, just there: you deployed a one size fits all blackbox of a container that, by definition, on top of pulling all the inefficiencies and redundancies of docker, isn't tuned for your specific hardware and operational needs. I get the appeal of containers, but if you want to self-host responsibly, you've got to be in control of what's running and how.
Sorry if this sounds harsh.
I honestly don't see how my issues are related to docker. Sure the occ app was missing (or I just couldn't find it, but the conclusion was that I didn't even need it)
I'm running Linux so there's not really any inefficiencies in regards to resources AFAIK - it's just namespaces and cgroups.
I could give you plenty of reasons why you would be worse-off deploying from docker without deep understanding of what's going on, but to only list a few out of the obvious pile:
your container ships a bunch of things that you do not need and that take-up significant server resources. Not just nextcloud apps that you will never need but get loaded nonetheless, but also things like redis and a full-fledged collabora server that only make sense in a large-scale instances.
your container isn't tuned for your server because whoever made the container had no way to know that in advance. For instance, It might be that your php-fpm forks beyond your multithreading or IO capabilities, that your application cache isn't adequate wrt. your system's RAM memory, etc
your containers duplicate functionalities from each other and from the operating system. You don't need more than one http server, database, application process manager, interpreter, … but they add-up nonetheless and reduce the pool of available resources from the rest of the system and containers.