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this post was submitted on 02 Aug 2024
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It is almost the exact conversation I (autistic) have had with all of my non-autistic partners.
I've definitely had issues with rigid thinking and have had conversations (well, fights…) about it with my partners, but I think the reason that I've not run into this specific stereotype is that I'm completely OK with ambiguity which I guess is a bit surprising
Isn't that what he is pointing out in the video?
To me, and what I got from the video, everything is basically on a continuum and ambiguous. Nothing is ever absolute, it's just more or less likely.
That doesn't really play well though with the way most people are actually wired to benefit from "lying" (being positive, or reciting positive or affirming mantras) to themselves. I can't speak for any autistic person other than myself, but I personally find the exercise of finding the silver lining or reciting positive affirmations to myself to actually be harmful and upsetting despite knowing that research indicates it is a helpful thing for more neurotypical people. Neither group/person is wrong, they just interpret things differently through no fault of their own.
Oh yeah it was a part of what he was saying, although he seemed to be specifically also saying he's not comfortable with ambiguity and likes it when people "follow rules", which I took to be what some people refer to as "black and white thinking"
Gotcha.
That makes sense. The way I interpreted the statement about following the rules was that although everything is basically shades of gray that needs to be analyzed and have probabilities assigned to, that's really tiring and taxing. When people follow rules (or more generally do what they say they are going to do) it removes the need to process and analyze what they are doing because they are operating within that predefined framework that is already understood.