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Why does “come here” bother me so much?
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2023
388 points (91.6% liked)
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Not OP here, what do I do if this is my mother?
Talk to your mother and go to counseling, or don't talk to your mother and go to counseling
LOL wish I knew, because my mom makes this look silly. it would take three novels to explain. I went down to visit recently, and my sister and aunt were there, bless them, lovely people. Best advice I got is look out for those you care about. If you're the only one left, then focus on you.
Had the same problem with my mum and she did not take my complaints serious in the slightest. Especially with the pandemic, she got so used to just calling me whenever.
I'm not fully convinced this couldn't be solved in a less nuclear way, especially if you don't have my mum, but I ended up resolving that issue, along with many others, by moving out.
Talk to them and go to counselling if it can't be solved with a chat
Depends roughly on how old you are. Take these age ranges with a grain of salt, but:
If you're young, as in college age or younger, and still living under her roof, pick your battles but chances are excellent you'll get up at least some of the time just to preserve the free or discounted rent situation.
If you're between college age and retirement age, you'll either work it out with her as a mostly-equal adult OR you'll go fully passive-aggressive, sit-on-my-ass, you-come-to-me -- until you move the fuck out. (Why are you still there, anyway? Setbacks are one thing, but if it looks like a forever thing, take a moment and reconsider your life choices.)
If you're over retirement age, you'll hop up like Almighty God herself was calling you, because now your mom is very old and very frail and very forgetful, and you REALLY don't want to have the cops calling you because they just found her wandering around the intersection in front of the Walmart a couple miles down the road, so you hop off your ass NOW if you even think you hear her call out.
Then you should divorce immediately