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Why does “come here” bother me so much?
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2023
388 points (91.6% liked)
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This isn’t investing in time, thought and energy though. This is random impulsive things, regardless of if I’m at work, or on a call or just trying to wind down after a 12 hour day. I work a full time job and a side gig, and he is, at this point, semi-retired. I do the majority of the housework and childcare jobs. We contribute to our household income at about 5:1. Im already exhausted, but I feel like he wants me to spend any free second I have entertaining him. He has no interests except his guitar (which he gets his fill of at work as a teacher about 25 hours a week) and his PS5. So if neither of those are entertaining him, then I’m expected to provide entertainment for him. I’m really just tired and frustrated. Have you ever had someone who literally just wants to fill up every spare moment you have with something they need before ? There are days where I’m cleaning the kitchen at midnight and he’s getting snippy because he’s been waiting forever for me to get finished to come and play this game so he can watch (he makes it sound like it’s really a favour for me because he’ll rub my back halfassedly while I play). He’s not investing in anything, and he’s got a lot of energy to spare. I don’t.
That is more than "Hey come here".
If it's "hey come here (look at this for 5 seconds)" it's a completely different thing that him getting his knickers in a bunch because you're not following his narrative when you're taking care of the household.
The way you described it was more of him seeing something on the pc and asking you to come look or him asking you to come over and help him temporarily with something.
Not disregard household chores so that you can play his game in the middle of the night.
I would say it's two different things completely.
I am sorry that I misunderstood the situation. I would also tell him to man the fuck up or there will be consequences. And the consequences would be you not doing his part of the dishes or his psrt of the laundry so that he will have to pick up the slack or however the hell you want to retaliate. Unacceptable. You deserve someone who appreciates you for whonyou are and what you do.