Hey if the man who is dying of prostrate cancer consents who am I to judge who shits on whom.

Mood

Nudging my friend whenever the seven samurai are on screen: those are the seven samurai

My dog HATES people jogging or cycling. I’m convinced he’s being paid off by some shadowy heart surgeon organization to discourage cardio.

The hardest part about being a grower is having to maintain a semi in the gym showers so no one thinks you have a small dick, but also it doesn’t look like you’re enjoying the shower too much.

sorry to hear it, comrade

I’m starting an NGO whose goal will be to make it so that by 2050 most of the pacific garbage patch is made of recycled plastics.

Imagine being the guy at some Saudi intelligence agency pitching running some ship sails into the Brooklyn bridge as your idea for 9/11-2.

A Lean night

Very funny Virgil is still in the header

My mom’s a yapper and she talks really loud and fast. It can be a lot sometimes, it’s really exhausting if you’re already tired.