Pierbattista Pizzaballa, I hope.

And that is not a joke, that is the legal name of the best cardinal for the job

To answer the question in the title: my money's on an old white man with homophobic and misogynistic tendencies.

There are currently 252 Catholic cardinals, but only 135 are eligible to cast ballots as those over the age of 80 can take part in debate but cannot vote.

You're telling me the Catholic church has more term limits than the US Supreme Court?

The Catholic church will elect another magical thinker in chief and he'll carry on peddling magical thinking. What else could happen?

Hopefully, Interpol catches JD Vance?

Ehrm..another pope?

They should unmothball Benedict XVI: he's uniquely qualified to deal with Donald Trump, being a former Hitler Youth.

Just listen to Pitura Freska, my peers. We need a black pope.

I'm not Catholic any more, for decades, but it was nice to know the pope was from my "turf" of the world instead of yet another European. Plus he was considerably humbler than other popes, the instructions for his own burial are a good example. (In fact a lot of people I know get surprised when you mention that he was a Jesuit instead of a Franciscan. Not just because of his papal name - but because all that "think on the poor" discourse is extremely Franciscan.)

His Easter 2025 message is worth a read, regardless of religion.

I believe Ralph Fiennes has to navigate a Catholic-flavoured Game of Thrones so that a surprise candidate from Mexico can get the job

Papa V Perpetua

Requiescat in pace.

New pope /thread

Now somebody needs to kidnap Jude Law and keep him in a basement until after the white smoke.