I'm at a loss of what to do here because I don't know them that well and don't want to be too intrusive.

For the past year or so I've been new friends with "Frankie", and although we are not close, I'd say we're more than acquaintances. We don't know each other well, and have interacted a handful of times. Frankie has been eager to socialize and do activities with us, and I hope to become better friends with Frankie.

I've always gotten a "vibe" from Frankie that things are not great at home. We've met the spouse a couple of times and they've always given me bad vibes; They are uninterested and unengaged, not really friendly. I'm pretty socially awkward myself and have had my share of unfair judgement based on misunderstood social interactions and so I just gave spouse some slack there.

But Frankie is unhappy. I can tell just from conversation Frankie struggles with depression and life. I know that Frankie sees a therapist and is trying to be more social and active to improve mental health. I check in on Frankie periodically by text and durring a text conversation tonight, there are red flags of an abusive relationship. I asked how Frankie was doing, and I got a response "Just a lot of isolation and depression." and later in the conversation I invited Frankie to an event this weekend and they said:

Frankie: "[Spouse] hates that stuff and won't let me go." Me: "Not even by yourself?" F: "Nope. Says I'm too trusting of people and will get hurt." Me: "Too trusting? How?" F: "I talk to strangers. I help people who need help. I smile and say hello to people whenever I'm out and about..."

At this point, I was a bit stunned and didn't know exactly how to respond. I've never had someone be so direct in telling me something like this before. I know this sounds very much like textbook isolation and gaslighting. But I also thought that because I don't know Frankie very well, this might just be an emotional moment. I can think of a couple times in my life where I was struggling emotionally and might have said something snide about my partner in confidence to someone else, and it wasn't really fair or truthful. I don't know anything about Frankie's mental health other than they are struggling.

Without judgement, I said "Well you're more than welcome to come with us [ to the event ] and we can keep an eye on you. wink wink" I tend to try and inject humor into things, even when it may not be appropriate. I don't know how else to handle it.

I said: "This sounds like a difficult situation, if you ever need to talk, I'm here." Frankie: "Yeah, it has been a difficult situation for a while."

I went on to be clear: Frankie is always welcome at our house, and I am always available to talk if needed. Let's hang out more. I couldn't bring myself to be more direct and inquire deeper because I feel like I don't know Frankie well enough, and also to put it bluntly: I can't handle being a counselor right now and that is usually my immediate reaction: to dive in over my head to help someone. I'm trying to break this habit already.

But now what? Do I leave it alone? Do I make more an effort to un-isolate Frankie? Do I trust that Frankie got the message that I'm here as an escape hatch? I always try to live that other people's marriages are none of my business - lord knows my own has had some very private struggles, but when it comes to abuse it's different. I just don't know what to do next?