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I suppose you could ask if she refuses to use your preferred name/pronouns (assuming she does) because of personal views or legal/policy reasons.
There are definitely jurisdictions where teachers/counsellors are obligated to get permission from parents to use names that don't match the sex listed elsewhere.
I wonder if the counsellor would object to using a nickname that's not similar to your name but is still a girls name. I only ask because Toni Braxton is a woman, maybe you could tell your counsellor you're really inspired by her and would she please call you "Toni"?
Depending on where you live there very well could be some new BS law that says school staff is not allowed to call you a different name or pronoun. That's the world we live in now.
It is almost certainly a legal issue, and not their choice, but I am surprised this would not have been explained to you if it is the case. There are states in the US, including the one I am in, where it is explicitly illegal for school staff to use any names or gender references other than the ones provided/approved by the parents in your record, even in private. It is entirely possible they have no choice here.
What a bunch of pussies. Even in private?
Call her “sir” if she uses the wrong pronouns
“I’m a ma’am”
“Oh I thought it was opposite day for morons”
Heh, though I think a long and less overtly antagonistic approach might be more fun. If she does end up being a transphobe, use sir/he/him, and never acknowledge any corrections.
If ever reprimanded by the administration, say you've never seen "his" birth certificate or spoken to "his" parents.
this post was submitted on 02 Jan 2026
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Relationship Advice
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