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What Linux Distro is your Christian Denomination?
(lemmings.world)
Heaven's Gate: TempleOS
Presbyterian Biker ? (Bazzite)
Checks out
I understand very few of these, except for arch, slack and the bottom row.
How is ope suse and chrome Os related? Are baptist and southern baptist very different?
Arch is the denomination that is super proud of itself, despite being messed up for most people. OpenSuse is Baptist due to it's general reliability and flexibility. ChromeOS is Southern Baptist because it's barely recognizable as Linux.
I've heard mostly bad things about southern baptists, so I understand why the chrome os. I'm unsure of the relations of baptists and southern baptists.
Evangelicals are typically traditional, very conservative, and proud. I thats a play on the arch user of doing everything in the command line and letting everyone know.
Orthodox is has some nuonsed diffrences to Catholic, but is under a different hierarchy. Not sure how that relates to slackware
The bottem row are all non Christian, so they are aptly not linux.
Orthodox is Slackware because it's the oldest Christian denomination and changes very slowly.
Northern baptists were decentralized abolitionists, while southern baptists were centralized and pro-slavery.
If I go distro->religion then I guess I'm Orthodox.
If I go religion->distro then I guess I need to start using a TI graphing calculator.
I was really proud of a lot of these jokes by the way. Many are multi-layered.
Where does that put Judaism? Just a bare Linux kernel without the rest of the OS?
Judaism is Unix.
Oh, of course!
Nah Unix should be Zoroastrianism and Judaism should be Minix
I feel like you made this chart for me specifically, so thank you
Slackware really should be Church of the Subgenius.
Unitarian Universalism
To stick to the theme of my chart, since Unitarian Universalism is non-trinitarian it would likely need to be a Unix-like OS that isn't Linux. I would give it OpenSolaris. (And that's a compliment.)
I freaking loved Opensolaris!, so that works too!
I think several on your chart don’t believe in the Trinity? Pretty sure LDS, JW, and at least some Pentecostal? I think they all self-identify as Christian, though, but some Unitarians might not? Is that the difference?
That's my exact thought process. I put LDS at Android because they do identify as Christian, but we are really stretching the definition of what technically counts as Christian.
Honestly I don't know as much as I ought to about UU, but I didn't think that they generally identify as Christian.
ReactOS should be mormonism
~~It's not Linux, thus not even "Christian"~~
I just noticed, that the scheme also includes e.g. "Atheism" and "pagan", which aren't Christian denominations either.
Well to be fair, atheism and pagan also are assigned to non-Linux OSes here.
Yes, the title of the scheme is confusing.
I really thought more people in this group would get that joke.
Linux Distro
Windows 11, macOS, and FreeBSD on the list
Wat
Think about it a little more....
A prosperity gospel church is still a church, unless you're referring to WSL as the equivalent of "Linux".
I do not consider those churches to be Christian. Their theology is significantly removed from orthoxy that it's unrecognizable.
But even still, as with WSL, you can find some Christianity in there if you work really hard to find it.
Exhibit 9370 supporting officially renaming the "no true Scotsman" logical fallacy to "no true Christian"
Running Fedora, was raised Presbyterian. 🤯
I was unaware that the CoC would be cool enough to have motorcyclists.
Depends on the CoC.
It's kinda a weird one in a lot of ways.
How do I know this isn't proganda from Big Christianity?
~guess this chart makes me metheodist tho~
Well, I am Anglican...
Is CachyOS Unitarian Universalist? Or watching church on TV on Sunday morning?
I think NixOS might be Unitarian Universalist. Dreamed up in a doctoral thesis, seems neat, half a dozen ways to do anything (none of which are truly wrong), access to all the packages in the world, terrible documentation.
Spot on as a FreeBSD and macOS user but those are UNIX rather than Linux (though I use Alpine Linux pretty heavily too).
FreeBSD and macOS user but those are UNIX rather than Linux
Yes, and the meme is which branch of christianity the OS is the equivalent of.
"Atheism" and "Spiritual but not religious" are not braches of christianity
“Atheism” and “Spiritual but not religious” are not braches of christianity
Is the joke really that complicated?
I disagree. You have MacOS as "Spiritual but not Religious".
MacOS is Hillsong.
Also, many of these are not Christian, and many of these are not Linux.
MacOS is Hillsong.
I can see that.
Also, many of these are not Christian, and many of these are not Linux.
I'm aware.
Wait, ChromeOS was explicitly created to support the institution of chattel slavery? Who knew?!
Sounds about right to me.
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this post was submitted on 25 Feb 2026
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