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My sister has 5 children. I have no idea how she manages, but she never sees her husband. He's always working triple overtime.
How sad of a life is that? Why do they do that? Do they hate spare time and thinking so much that they prefer to literally drown in work?
fear of death and the need for legacy
Legacy of what? Being broke and overworked? And how do kids help me with the fear of death (probably more the fear of dying, not death. Unless you're a religious nutjobs on top of it)
Questions over questions 😁
Snip snip
Childcare costs are by far the highest expense for families with children under 5, according to LendingTree’s analysis. Parents in Hawaii pay an average of $40,342 per year, whereas families in Maryland and Massachusetts pay $36,419 and $34,247, respectively.
So more than half of the cost is childcare. Why?
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/mar/24/childcare-daycare-cost-absurdly-expensive
Because there's no public system. Which is understandable because as the president said, US can't afford childcare. It needs money to bomb children in other countries.
Holy shit that's literally my whole gross income 🤯
I think that's on purpose. Gross income is probably the maximum some parents are willing to pay. You're basically not making any money but you're avoiding gaps in your CV. After 6-7 years the kid goes to school so childcare costs go away but you kept your job so now you're back to making money (instead of looking for a job after 5-6 years of unemployment). If you charge people more it makes more sense economically to stay at home and save money. If you charge them less you're leaving money on the table. Same as with healthcare private system is trying to squeeze everything it can out of people.
Childcare costs halve or something but they don't go away. You still need care coverage for an hour to four hours every workday, all school holidays, summers, sick days, half days, snow days... and that's assuming your job doesn't operate outside school hours (which in the US change every few years as children progress), or expect you to be on call.
Usually the type of careers with that kind of flexibility are either top of the field or the very bottom, so it feels kind of hopeless, damned if you work, damned if you don't.
I know things have changed but when I was 7 and started primary school (in Poland) I would walk alone to school and be perfectly fine staying alone at home. I would also spend school holidays and summers running around outside all day with other kids. At what age it is considered that kids don't need any babysitters or childcare today?
But yes, the costs probably don't go to 0 but even if they halve you still start making some money so it still may make sense to make next to nothing for couple of years in order to save your career.
I know a dumbass or 2 who are expecting soon. At this point you're not even using any kind of sense in how you live.
Poor children will be American citizens
....or will they....
And that's why birthrate has dropped to 1.6%
The cost is insane I agree, but more than that, people simply do not have the time to properly raise children anymore due to that expense. It's the time much more than the money that is making the kids suffer long term, if none of the parents are ever around or are preoccupied with other things, you end up with insane psychopathic assholes like Donald Trump.
I consider myself fortunate to make what I make but also get to balance it by walking my kids to school in the morning, picking them up in the afternoon, making dinners, and just be around. If I wanted, I could take more high-profile work and be out of the house and make double what I make now, but the expense of not seeing my kids and not being a part of their lives is not worth it to me. When they're teenagers and want nothing to do with me because I'm embarrassing, then we will see, but for now, I am more value to them being around.
Wonderful! It's just a rearrangement of priorities, somewhere they got all mixed up, and the kids have suffered tremendously for it. Parenting can't really be offloaded no matter how attractive it sounds, it might work for some kids, but kids really need and deserve attention and care, I saw that in myself I wasn't really capable of giving that much of my time and attention and patience so I chose not to have kids. People shouldn't have to make that choice though really, everyone should be able to have kids if they want, although I think these families with 15+ kids are really fucking ridiculous and extremely selfish.
Pretty sure Trump was born rotten. Having rich parents just made him worse.
And raising kids sucks even without the prohibitive financial cost.
Raising kids sucks because modern society is incompatible with human-ness in general.
this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2026
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