It’s from Tuesday, but it should still be good. Better, even. It gives the flavors time to mingle.
Finally a president with some damn sense
You know what? Yeah, I'll fuck with some chili.
Don't fuck the chili.
Shit. I'd eat chili with Biden.
Hell yeah, and if secret service didn’t tackle me for taking out my phone to take a selfie, I’d even take my chances and ask if he wants to go for an ice cream cone afterwards.
You offer to hop on amtrak as well and the man would literally hug you.
Goddamn this is way funnier than it has any right being
I bet the white house kitchen makes bomb chili though
A nice bowl of chili deserves a cracker.
When asked about his family recipe, Biden stated that the secret is to undercook the onions.
Can we fire up the grill and throw some dogs on it too?
Out of all the shit the Onion puts out, why they gotta joke about some chili? That’s plain evil. EVIL!
Seriously, they got no chili chill
Reminds me of a joke though:
Yo mama so stupid she heard it was gonna be chilly, so she went outside with a bowl and spoon.
Can’t tease me with a headline like that. I got my hopes up and everything.
I'd be interested but I literally just made some yesterday.
Only reheating it for a minute? Soup like foods need a couple minutes on medium-high power if you don't want ðem to be cold or get a microwave skin.
In a minute, not for a minute. As in, 1 minute from now I will be starting the microwave.
I know, I misread it too.
Eh, I don't miss it at all.
A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing: