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[-] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 79 points 1 year ago

“If you kill me, you’re gay in Russian” written in Serbian with sharpie.

[-] nuke@sh.itjust.works 62 points 1 year ago
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[-] Milk_Sheikh@lemm.ee 57 points 1 year ago

“I have autism, please be patient”

If you’re gonna draft me, I’m sure as fuck playing into the ‘useless Joe’ meme and try and break my 1Sgts will to live

[-] verity_kindle@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago

It's a strategy. You might get extra training that helps you live longer... .

[-] Milk_Sheikh@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago

Play it up too well and you might get some sweet cybernetics!

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[-] AtomfriedMegaforce@lemmy.world 54 points 1 year ago

"This side towards enemy" but on the backside of the helmet

[-] Anticorp@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

*gets shot by commanding officer the first day out of basic

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[-] d00ery@lemmy.world 52 points 1 year ago

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.

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[-] grue@lemmy.world 45 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

"Born to kill" and a peace sign.

(What can I say? I'm a sucker for the classics.)

Edit: after having read some of the responses in this thread, I might update it for modern times with "Yiff in hell" and a dickbutt.

[-] TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

"What is that? Some kind of sick joke!?"

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[-] 4RCH_U53R@lemmy.world 43 points 1 year ago

I use Arch BTW

[-] psmgx@lemmy.world 42 points 1 year ago

In case of KIA delete browser history

[-] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 33 points 1 year ago

Idk but my gun is definitely getting named “Rooty-Tooty-Point-and-Shooty”

[-] Milk_Sheikh@lemm.ee 28 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

“Object Embedding Tool” 🤌

[-] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

Lol. How about “Enemy truncator”

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[-] neidu2@feddit.nl 32 points 1 year ago

O+

I haven't been in the army in 15 years and would probably need to prepare for a lot of blood transfusions.

[-] Remmock@kbin.social 31 points 1 year ago

A superglued pull tab for an aluminum can.

An ingredient list and nutritional information on the side.

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[-] MIDItheKID@lemmy.world 26 points 1 year ago
[-] GnomeKat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 25 points 1 year ago

Helmussy (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)

my head goes in it after all...

[-] dsco@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 1 year ago
[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago
[-] Flumpkin@slrpnk.net 20 points 1 year ago

"Begun, the Climate Wars have"

[-] setsneedtofeed@lemmy.world 20 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I suppose at this point, plain MESHPAT is considered retro enough to be cool again.

[-] Im_old@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

So when your heads explodes the helmet becomes shrapnel?

[-] setsneedtofeed@lemmy.world 21 points 1 year ago

Yeah, that's exactly what spray paint dots do. You got it.

Idk, sounds perfectly credible to me.

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[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago

Born 2 Shit Forced 2 Wipe

[-] Delphia@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago
[-] zaphod@sopuli.xyz 11 points 1 year ago

TFW they tell you it wasn't a simulation and the war is suddenly over.

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[-] einfach_orangensaft@feddit.de 19 points 1 year ago

"I just flew cargo drones"

In, Chinese, Russian, and English.

the entirety of the vaporeon copypasta

[-] waitwuhtt@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 year ago

Born to Feel

[-] AtmaJnana@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago

If I'm gonna die for a word, my word is poontang

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[-] SoupBrick@yiffit.net 16 points 1 year ago

"I fought in WWIII and all I got was this stupid PTSD."

[-] Mongostein@lemmy.ca 14 points 1 year ago
[-] nuke@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 year ago

Go away I'm baitin

[-] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

"When I'm dead, just throw me in the trash"

[-] spizzat2@lemm.ee 13 points 1 year ago

One side will say "Why am I here?"

The other side will say "Oh no, not again."

[-] Wirrvogel@feddit.de 12 points 1 year ago

"Comic Sans" in Comic Sans of course.

[-] thesporkeffect@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago

I'm gonna write 'Papyrus' but in comic sans.

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[-] evening_push579@feddit.nu 12 points 1 year ago

🍁NERV or “Taiwan best China”

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[-] HotDogFingies@kbin.social 12 points 1 year ago

I HATE MONDAYS

[-] Lolman228@kbin.social 11 points 1 year ago

~~Single~~ ~~Taken~~ Gamer

[-] metaStatic@kbin.social 11 points 1 year ago
[-] theodewere@kbin.social 11 points 1 year ago

headed down to the Winchester

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[-] ExfilBravo@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

"Head in the clouds" with pictures of nuclear mushroom clouds behind it.

[-] tristan@aussie.zone 10 points 1 year ago
[-] Sorgan71@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago
[-] mriormro@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

"You've got red on you"

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this post was submitted on 16 Feb 2024
203 points (94.7% liked)

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