I've tried to counter this by cultivating a Russian roulette mindset when opening my replies. Fuck it, open it, we'll all find out

I have the unfortunate distinction of being accustomed to people's resentment towards me at this point. I am no less timid, but it's routine now. However, putting myself in another's shoes, I make clear what you fear is unlike me. There are a million ways to debate the semantics of judgment, but only characterization can stand above the rest.

I used to have such fear, especially when I was younger. not just an inbox fright but also some sort of "reaction fright" meaning that I was scared a lot about people's reaction in a face-to-face conversation

Maybe at work. Getting an email at work means... well, work.

Yes.

I think I have a mental disorder where if people online are angry at me I actually start introspecting a lot rather than blowing it off. Sometimes I have something I want to say anyway and emotionally prepare to eat it.