1

I don't have any issue talking to girls when the intent is not romantic/sexual. OK I have met someone, first few conversations went alright, how do I transition to something else without being embarrassed and feeling like a dick? Like, if I want to say something technical or communicate for something else, everything is fine. Otherwise, I feel very embarrassed and feel like I will be disgusting to her if I said something... I guess it is me trying to be OK with everyone and not have more people hate me... I don't know if I can take any more people hating me... makes me feel worthless...

top 19 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] BillDaCatt@lemmy.world 5 points 4 months ago

Flirting is a cooperative effort. You can have great game and still fail if she isn't interested. You might also meet a girl that gives you a positive reaction, but you might miss it if you aren't looking at her that way. It takes two to make flirting work.

If you want to get to know girls; tell a few jokes or funny stories. If you think a girl might actually like you, tell her a dumb joke. If she laughs, she probably likes you. If she doesn't laugh, she's not interested yet. Keep trying and you will learn what works and what doesn't.

There are lots of women in this world so try talk to as many women as you can. Be persistent without being aggressive and you will do just fine. There is someone out there for everyone.

[-] AFKBRBChocolate@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

Where people get into trouble is when they assume that because the other person is being nice to them, it means they're interested in something more. I know women who say they can hardly smile at a guy without being asked out on a date. But of course sometimes that are interested, and it can be hard to know without asking, which can be awkward for both.

If you think she might potentially be interested, you might consider inviting her to something casual, like getting a meal or seeing a movie. That in itself won't tell you she's interested, but if she's not interested in something casual, she likely isn't interested in more than what you have.

[-] Mechanismatic@lemmy.ml 1 points 4 months ago

Flirtation is a lot easier and more comfortable when you know the person already likes you. And it can seem creepy to them if they don't already like you. So it might be good to not flirt until you're confident it will be well received and in the meantime just be friendly and sincere. An important aspect of potential relationships is not appearing as if you think someone's only value is if they're a potential partner. People talk to and know other people, so treating everyone well can improve chances of potential partners thinking well of you. Sometimes the best thing you can do to find a partner is to work on yourself.

[-] Drusas@kbin.run 1 points 4 months ago

Working on your self-esteem first or alongside your dating efforts will be the most useful thing you can do. This is both in terms of your own personal well-being and in how attractive you will be as a potential partner.

[-] Ballistic_86@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

You should just tell them you are not good at flirting and be more direct. It has worked very well for me. You can also work on getting a bit better by just doing so under the context that you are bad and it can be something funny between you and your match/potential partner.

[-] Hikermick@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

Flirting is a compliment. Don't be ashamed of complimenting people, we could all use a little more of it

[-] Mango@lemmy.world 0 points 4 months ago

It's a lot easier when it's not against the rules basically everywhere.

[-] Drusas@kbin.run 1 points 4 months ago
[-] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 0 points 4 months ago

You and me both, brother. But, I did somehow end up getting married twice and having a bunch of kids, so, there's hope for everyone!

[-] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 0 points 4 months ago

Yeah, one of the thousand pound sisters got married and had a kid.

[-] NoIWontPickAName@kbin.earth 1 points 4 months ago

I don’t get it and googling their username didn’t help

[-] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 0 points 4 months ago

Why would you google their username and if you did why would you publicly admit to it?

[-] NoIWontPickAName@kbin.earth 1 points 4 months ago

I don’t understand the thousand pound sister thing.

Usually stuff like that is a username pun

[-] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 0 points 4 months ago

I did somehow end up getting married twice and having a bunch of kids, so, there’s hope for everyone

one of the thousand pound sisters got married and had a kid.

[-] NoIWontPickAName@kbin.earth 1 points 4 months ago

I get that part.

I don’t get why you called them a thousand pound sister

[-] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

I didn't call them that, it was agreeing with their point that anyone (the thousand pound sisters) can get married and have a kid.

[-] NoIWontPickAName@kbin.earth 1 points 4 months ago

Oh! I googled the wrong one. I get you now.

[-] Nougat@fedia.io 0 points 4 months ago

Always remember: If you say something to someone which "alarms or disturbs" them, you can be arrested for disorderly conduct.

Edit: Even if you do no such thing, all they have to do is lie.

[-] GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip 1 points 4 months ago

Great advice for someone already scared of talking to women... Why not give them an irrational fear of miscommunication as well huh

this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2024
1 points (100.0% liked)

Relationship Advice

0 readers
5 users here now

Welcome to the Relationship Advice community on Lemmy and Kbin!

The ideal place to ask for help with your relationships: romantic, friendships, we don't know what we are yet, co-workers or just human interactions in general.

Please make sure you read our rules before posting.

Rules:

Rules can be clicked on to be expanded.

1: Treat all users with respect. [!]

The goal of this community is helping OP and readers, not making fun of them. We are an inclusive community, any sort of disrespect towards ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion, etc, will not be tolerated.

2: Mark sexual content as NSFW. [!]

Posts containing mentions or descriptions of sexual topics must be tagged as NSFW. This includes descriptions of sexual acts, requests for advice in the bedroom, explicit descriptions of your body and similar content.

3: All posts must be a request for advice.

All posts must be phrased as a request for advice or as a question. Sharing of stories, personal anecdotes, or past mistakes are only allowed if they're followed by a clear and relevant request for advice with the situation.

4: Provide sufficient and relevant information.

Your title and body need to contain enough information relevant to your situation, such as ages, genders, and the relationship between people mentioned. For privacy-related concerns, we recommend using fake names and broad general locations.

5: Comments must be on topic and relevant to OP.

Comments must be directly related to helping OP, asking for more information, providing relevant resources or otherwise relevant to the thread. Off-topic comments and remarks, suspicious attempts at gathering personal data from OP or other readers, or bullying will not be tolerated.

6: This is a community for requesting advice, not moral judgement.

Moral judgements, "AITA?" and other similar questions are better served by different communities.

Reddit reposts are allowed.

As a temporary measure and the result of a poll, Reddit reposts are allowed following an expanded set of rules: https://lemmy.world/post/317115

How are rules enforced and bans applied?

For the most part, this community operates under the assumption that users are acting in good faith and should be given second-chances for their mistakes. Posts and comments with very light rule violations, or otherwise undesired but mostly harmless content, can be removed by a moderator on a case by case basis without any further punitive actions.

For violations of our rules, we follow a “3 strike” system as follows:

  • 1st violation: 72 hours ban + moderator warning via PMs.

  • 2nd violation: 1 week ~ 1 month ban + final warning via PMs.

  • 3rd violation: 1 month ~ permanent ban.

The goal of this system is making sure users are made aware of their behavior before being permanently banned, but also protecting the community from any rule violations.

Exceptions:

While the “3 strike” system will be applied to the majority of situations, rules marked with a [!] in the sidebar signifies a rule that, if violated in an intentional, malicious or significant way, can warrant an immediate permanent ban regardless of the number of previous violations. This includes severe disrespect to users or groups, dangerous content, and similar.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago