20

>Be me
>Be 20 in uni.
>Going to study with friends in liberry.
>Text friend asking where to meet him.
>He says on 3rd floor.
>Go to liberry.
>Go to 3rd floor.
>Dent see friend.
>Look down bookcase rows.
>See friend seated facing away from me towards the window at a desk in his trademark blue hoodie.
>Approach my friend.
>Gay-chicken-protocol engaged.
>I intend to win the ongoing gay-chicken war here and now.
>Sneak up behind friend.
>Swing legs over back of chair one at a time.
>Slide down behind friend so my crotch is touching his ass.
>Cup his breasts.
>Pull him tight.
>Friend turns around.
>Not friend.
>Total stranger.
> Never seen this kid before.
>His face...
>Ohgod.jpg
>I move head closer to his ear.
>Whisper, You arent John...
>Proceed to stand up and powerwalk down the stairs
>Out the liberry.
>Off campus.
>Walk 9 blocks & get chipotle.

top 6 comments
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[-] Amir@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 year ago

Wtf is the gay chicken protocol

[-] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 year ago

Between a pair of heteronormative fellas, performing homosexual acts of an increasingly aggressive nature until one or the other says “I’m out.” It’s like regular chicken but with the potential for spontaneous penetration or longterm commitment.

[-] Nepenthe@kbin.social 3 points 1 year ago

A normal human with a normal amount of legs would only need to swing one of them over once.

[-] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago

normal human

Where did you see one of those things? Anon is anon and his fireman’s pole has ptsd.

[-] JokeDeity@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago

"Liberry" already explains this person is a full blown retard, but this seals it.

[-] GrimSheeper@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Drop out of school

Change name

Move to another country

this post was submitted on 14 Sep 2023
20 points (95.5% liked)

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