Jesus, my heart dropped for a second because this legitimately seems like something this admin would/will do.
Congratulations, we see you have learned French, so now you qualify for immediate and forceful relocation to Cameroon!
Well, shit. I was hoping for Tahiti.
I heard it was a magical place…
A place where the beer flows like wine, and the women flock like the wild salmon of Capistrano.
Wait. Nope, sorry- I'm thinking of Aspen, not Tahiti.
More likely they would be telling white women learning other languages in preparation to emigrate elsewhere that they aren't allowed to leave the country as they are now property.
Same friend, same. I ate it hard at first.
No wonder Duo got killed by a swatzicar…
Ok I ate the onion lol
With current Murican administration, The Onion wipes out the line between fiction and reality.
Stop with this kind of headline your making me panic about this shit more than it already is panic inducing!!!
Joking about this stuff just isn't funny anymore.
Our planet is in a sad state when a headline like this could actually be real and the author of it needs to be commended for making the observation in such an effective way.
Shit, With this sad state of affairs I'd happily be surprised If it doesn't end up being one of those 'the onion was right" articles...
I'll see that green owl in Hell, I will!
Legit
I genuenly can't tell if this is real or not? If this is real this is some serious brainwashing.
Look at rhe community name.
A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing: