So I took a new job last month, mostly because I felt like I had stagnated in my previous role, both financially and growth-wise. My goal from the start was actually to get an offer letter and take it back to my employer to see if they would bump me up in pay to match it, or at least come close to it. I wasn't unhappy at my job, I just wanted something more after almost 10 years of service with little to no career advancement and the cost of living increases that don't even keep up with inflation.
Well, I did not have to search for long. I was headhunted for a role that is technically a promotion from my old job, and it came with a substantial salary increase. I took that offer back to my former employer and they offered me a very low raise as a counter. Not even coming close to the offer from the other place.
So I decided to take a chance on it and left for my current role. So far, I am not enjoying it. I anticipated that there would be some growing pains getting used to the new environment, new co-workers, new workflow and so on, but I've encountered a bunch of red flags within the first three weeks of working here and had I known about them I would have not accepted the position to begin with.
Mostly, I am just not feeling fulfilled here. I don't have a clear understanding of what my job responsibilities are, and they stuff they are having me do are not things that I envisioned myself performing in this role. There is no clear onboarding procedure, and every one of my peers seems to be chronically overworked.
I think the thing that is stressing me out the most, however, is that my old manager (whom I am friends with outside of work) said that I could have my old job back, but that he couldn't keep the seat warm for me forever. That window, as he told me last weekend when I spoke with him, is rapidly closing. If I wanted to go back, I would have to decide very soon. Part of me wants to tough it out for a while and see if the anxiety and apprehensiveness I'm feeling in the new job is just something that will pass in time, but another part of me wants to cut and run while I still have a chance to go back to some feeling of normalcy.
Does anybody have any advice? Is this normal? I did not feel this way when starting my last job, but I did have other short lived jobs where I felt almost exactly the same. Is it a matter of me not giving it enough time or should I listen to my instincts telling me something isn't right?
edit: Thanks y'all. There's some good wisdom out there. I appreciate everyone who took the time to write out a well thought out reply or shared their own experiences. I think for now I am going to tough it out, get the help of a therapist to work through some of my anxiety problems, and maybe in 6 months if things haven't started improving, I will start searching for a new job at a different company, not my previous employer.
Cut out social media from your life completely. No, I swear to god, this is life changing advice not some boomer platitudes about how kids these days are always in their phones.
You don't realize how much life you are missing by being completely stuck to your phone. I promise the world will continue to turn if you ignore your phone for a few hours at a time.
Quit Facebook, quit Instagram, quit X, quit TikTok. If you feel like you are bored and want to open the apps, try something else. Read a book, start a creative writing project, listen to music while meditating, play video games, do some woodworking, go for a walk or a hike with your dog, learn a new language, go out to the bar or club and socialize, go to the gym and work out, draw stuff from your imagination.
I promise promise promise you will feel better. Not right away, but very soon after you start doing these things instead of the vapid doomscrolling, shitposting, clout-chasing, self-aggrandizing social media spiral you will realize that you don't need your phone. You are able to live your best life when you aren't thinking about what's being posted online or taking constant selfies or photographing every meal you eat.
Your future self will thank me.