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Well that is when I am at work. My work times are clearly defined and when the time is over, I go home. So I am limited to about 8 hours in a day, with a very rare exception of 15 minutes longer.

After work and in the weekends I still have time to chill, but at work I have no downtime except for breaks. Luckily my boss also knows how busy we are and doesn't complain if I cannot get everything finished, he just tells me what is a priority and what not.

That is really helpful for the stress levels, but it is still a pretty stressful job.

They had a service I paid for. I paid for youtube without ads. Just that. And then they changed prices and made me pay for something that I did not need, YouTube Music. So I canceled.

They had me as a subscriber, they just wanted more money and lost me.

And I block ads. Not specifically for youtube, but for all sites and apps that I can. I use Blockada and most days the number of blocked tracking cookies goes over 1000. Laat 24 hours it is 3426 trackers blocked. Is it really necessary that I am being tracked that much?

I don't think so, and I am not even talking about malware, or crypto ming scripts that will be loaded as ads. Most ads are not checked properly so I have no idea what malicious bullshit I can get on my systems without even asking for it.

If I find something that I use a lot and adds value, I will donate some money. For example, I support some creators on Patreon.

And ads always do their best to be loud and intrusive. And if I have a guest at my house that is loud and intrusive, they don't get invited back. The same with ads.

Remember when ads were just a small rectangle on youtube? You clicked it away and that is it? That was the way. Serve ads in a normal, non intrusive way and I can handle them just fine.

The funny thing is, that whole thing just proved that the spying didn't work. Trump was still almost killed. So the spying and mass surveillance did still not prevent that.

I guess they should stop violating everybody's privacy, but obviously they don't care.

Shoot for getting about 70% right. That is about where the rest of the world ends up too. And the world is still turning. No need to drive yourself nuts doing the impossible.

Funny. I don't have a creditcard and I don't want one. That is the only reason I sometimes, maybe once or twice a year I use PayPal.

I wish them good luck building a profile on 2 purchases. Also, I'm in the EU and I suspect this will not be legal here.

I also cannot believe somebody thought it would be a great idea to introduce even more tracking and ads. Don't they understand they are driving away customers?

Well, it's only going to get worse. Go to a shelter. There are resources to help with debt, sometimes government programs.

If you stay you're just digging the hole deeper. Every day you stay you are making it harder for yourself to leave. I know it is difficult.

You're in a very very shitty situation. But out of all the choices you have available to you, staying is worst one you could possibly pick.

Do you have any friends or family that you can ask for help?

In the end it is your choice to stay or go. But make sure it is an actual choice and not just submitting because you don't see a way out.

If you go to a shelter or the cops they might be able to at least explain to you what options you have. Perhaps there are numbers you could call for domestic abuse victims?

It is very important that you take action or things will only get worse. And I cannot imagine you want to struggle the rest of your life while he keeps draining you of all your money.

My gf had been in sort of a similar situation. You need to get out. At all costs. Even if you have to leave the dogs.

He will just do whatever he needs to do to keep you desperate and on his leash. So no matter what you do, he won't met you save money, he won't give you a chance to get away ever.

The controlling behavior servers to keep you there at his disposal.

He is not going to change. You will have too. So get of your ass and leave. It's the only chance you have for a real life again. If you don't, you basically submit and accept that this will be your life forever.

I know that things may seem hopeless, but the situation you are in is affecting the way you think. You can get away, you can have a normal life but you have to decide that it is over and commit to getting away.

Naked model? Cooking meth? Sex worker?

Classic meditation method: don't block any thoughts, just accept any thought that pops up, and visualise it floating away. Usually does the trick for me.

Or visualize a water flow like a river streaming through your mind, taking all the thoughts with it.

There are lots of visualisations you can do to help clear your mind or control your emotions.

Things like that probably require some scripting. You can check if there are ready to go scripts that you can just copy, but most likely you'll have to program something up yourself. Even if there are scripts to copy, without understanding what they actually do and how they will work with WordPress you will have a hard time using them.

If you are not proficient in HTML yet, you are probably not ready for this. You'll need to learn some scripting, insert those scripts on the pages and for that you need a deeper understanding of how everything works.

Unfortunately this means there is no easy solution here, you'll have to put in the work to search and learn how to do this or you decide you don't need it after all.

Isn't that what most printers do anyway? They have one job and they fail at that?

I hate printers :(