[-] Rained1 2 points 1 year ago

True true - I guess time will tell if you're doing it correctly or not. Or you could just ask for feedback lol XD.

I'd reckon it's pre-mature if the date hasn't been agreed upon. IMHO - once it's agreed upon, any time between then and the date is a good time, just not last minute. Or you could bring it up immediately after the date has been agreed upon as it's potentially deciding where to go and what your partner's comfort zone is, etc.

Hmmmm - good question. I think the questions are too much(many) when the questions are too static. Add in some flare, maybe talk about some background story, make it interesting. Take it easy, and please don't read out the questions one by one lol.

When I was first starting out, this helped me quite a lot. You can give it a try - free resource on youtube FTW: https://www.youtube.com/@Charismaoncommand

Lol - If it gets easier, it means we're leveling up one way or another (irrespective whether it's success or failure). Just like sending in a whole bunch of job applications. We just need one to say yes! XD

[-] Rained1 2 points 1 year ago

As a guy, I'd try to manage/discuss expectations before the date happens, but after the date has been agreed upon. Best if there's some expectations some time before the date rather than just before the date happens - it'll be good not to shock your date lol. Different people have different characters/behaviors so do what feels the most comfortable for you (But not too uncomfortable for the other party). We're both here to enjoy ourselves after all :)

I don't think it should be too detailed or too vague. Just think of yourself from the date's point of view, receiving your own expectations - Is it too vague and they're in the dark or too detailed that its starting to feel like a project manager running a project?

Don't think about MYR100. A good date is about connection and not so much what you do (Although that helps too) PS: Replied a little late - I gotta get used to this application more lol.

[-] Rained1 3 points 1 year ago

Soooo....First time posting here (both here and reddit). All interesting and great ideas. IMHO, I'd do many of those for my 2nd date after I've known the date a little more (esp scary when meeting people for the first time via tinder, bumble, coffeemeetsbagel, etc. I've heard things going very wrong from their first dates. I'm M btw.

Just my 2 cents - I'd bring my first dates (especially if it's via dating apps) to a shopping mall. The main reason for these are:

  1. Public area(If meeting first time via dating apps, it's pretty scary meeting a stranger and this will reduce the amount of stress i.e. it's crowded and there's a low chance of something going wrong i.e. getting mugged or threatened or worst ....since there's cameras around malls)
  2. Easy alternatives - there are many alternatives to switch to - i.e. One U has a batting area, some malls have a garden, there's usually a movie theater as well, there's also some handicraft shops in some malls too and if all else fails, just walking around the mall and talking works too. It will also be useful to scope out after a meal/food on how well things are going and if there's no compatibility it's better to be clear, polite and mature about it - Don't leave your date hanging!
  3. 100 bucks is a good budget, but if you wanna cheap out, don't go for meals. Go for in-between meals. i.e. Coffee, desserts like cakes or ice cream, etc. Don't get anything that's too cheap though (you shouldn't be since a decent "in-between meals" are usually the same price or cheaper than "actual" meals in shopping malls).
  4. Don't forget the main point of the date is getting to know the other person. It doesn't have to be all fun and games although that certainly helps. Also communicate clearly to manage expectations pre-date.
  5. Good luck and don't forget to enjoy yourself

PS: This is from my personal experience and feel free to take it with a grain of salt. What works for me might not work for you.

Rained1

joined 1 year ago