No mother, it’s just the northern lights

Maybe not the worst but the most recent one is my father in law. You know the type: baby boomer who had every advantage growing up but didn’t avail himself but still managed to eke out a comfortable life while working at the business his dad started and he inherited. He doesn’t take in the bucks but it allows him and my mil to own a comfortable home in an area that is only going up in value. Anyway…

As you can imagine super religious, super right wing, trump loving, gay hating (has a gay brother that he’s estranged from), you know… the usual. What gets me is remember trump did an interview a week or two ago where he said that all federal employees are “crooked and dishonest and must be held accountable”? He couldn’t agree more! Guess who my wife (his daughter) and I work for? Yeah…

I get more people saying to me “wow you’re very tall” to which I respond with “yes and you are very observant” which I feel is funny in the moment but is just condescending enough to make them realize it later on.

Who are you and how did you get in here?

HELL YEAH MFER!

I have an actual answer. I bought a metal detector and naturally I set to work in the backyard to see if I could find anything cool. Well I don’t know if you think rusty nails and bottle caps are cool but I sure found a lot of those. I did find a lot of good time to practice though.

Fast forward a few months, I had branched out to local parks and such and hadn’t revisited the backyard. We were having some landscaping done which included digging up some tree stumps. For a lark I ran the detector over one of the holes a stump had come out of and I got a hit. Not just a hit but a hit that registered the same as a pre-1964 quarter. Silver.

After a little digging I pulled up a pair of vintage ww2 aerial gunnery wings! (Note: these aren’t the ones I found but they are very similar)

Not sure how I had missed them or what they were doing there but best I can figure is that since the house dated to the late 1950’s some kid grabbed his dads wings from the war and managed to lose them in the backyard and was never able to find them. Sad for dad but cool for me I guess

Jesus! mark this nsfw! I vomited in my mouth a little bit

I’m sorry, were you talking to me?

I came across this via Nextdoor and I couldn’t not post it here

Hey, I’ve seen this one. This is a classic!

Being tall is not all it’s cracked up to be, I assure you.

My back and knees constantly hurt, I can’t buy clothes at stores, dodging chandeliers and low doorways isn’t fun, there’s nothing interesting on the top of shelves and cabinets, no I don’t play basketball, every airplane is uncomfortable, my feet hang off the end of the bed, and where are all these women who want tall men?

If true