[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 9 points 5 months ago

Because Texas is a fascist state and gives not a shit for consistency. The governer just pardoned a murderer because he killed a BLM protestor. The sate only enforces the law against those they don't like, and give their christian nationalists a hard pass.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 5 points 7 months ago

Actually I have both, let me go check it real quick.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 7 points 8 months ago

Thank you. It's not about the makeup so much as that's one thing that is complex and intimidating among many things that are complex and intimidating about being a woman. It's the first thing I thought of, and I don't even know where to begin. I don't even have to wear makeup, many women don't. I feel like I'm at the bottom of a hill that looks steep and intimidating, I don't know if I can get to the top but at the same time this is just the first hill of the rocky mountains, and I have to get to the other side.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 4 points 8 months ago

Thank you, thats part off my plan going forward, when I can afford it.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 7 points 8 months ago

The paradox is that most closeted trans people are absolutely terrible at trusting their inner voice. When you spend your whole life with a nagging disconnect between how the world sees you and how you see yourself, it becomes easier to rely on other people to tell you “who you really are.” Even if you know deep down that all the people in your life are missing some fundamental fact about your identity, it’s nearly impossible to avoid listening to others over oneself.

This right here. my instincts are all off because every external voice told me i was wrong my whole life. Like I was always bad at tests because any time there was an obvious answer I had to question the wording or the context because me feeling right about something is always wrong.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 12 points 8 months ago

My god I was a lesbian the whole time!

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 14 points 8 months ago

I've talked to her. It was difficult to be coy about it the way it happened, and so far she's been a big help. But we both know this is way above her pay grade.Unfortunately money's tight, and getting a therapist isn't in the cards short term.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 7 points 8 months ago

Yeah, I've been trying to let everything settle in my mind before making any big decisions. It would be so easy to just jump in go nuts and make everything worse.

281
Oh shit oh fuck rule (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by subverted_per@sh.itjust.works to c/196@lemmy.blahaj.zone

This hit me like a week ago. I straight up panicked. I still kinda am. I don't know what to do. I'm fucking terrified. How do you learn how to be a girl in your forties? I don't even know how to do makeup, every time I tried it looked like shit.

I thought I was a femboy. A kinky weird femboy with a supportive girlfriend that didn't mind the occasional dressing up. This is probably way too much for her. I think it's too much for me. But now that I know this I can't not know it. It's like my subconscious just came out of nowhere and was like, "Hey you know that quirky thing about you? Well it turns out that's entirely you, and you're miserable trying to deny it. By the way everything in your experience tells you that people will hate you for it, and the state is actively trying to harm people like you. Also crazy people will probably want to kill you about it Byeeeeeeee!"

What do?

Edit: Thanks everyone for all the helpful comments. All this is still big and scary right now, but I feel a little better about where I am now, and the first few steps. This is a good community here.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 4 points 8 months ago

Well yeah, that was my first thought. They coat a part of the plane with a radioactive isotope. It would have to be a lot of the stuff to ionize enough air around the part to hide it from radar. Considering that the plane is flying, and the air around it doesn't sit still I would guess that in certain frequencies it would be bright as the sun. If this thing works as stated I wouldn't get close to that thing without a decent amount of concrete between us.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 4 points 10 months ago

Young Athsma Inhaler

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 year ago

I honestly feel sorry for all these rubes, getting so wrought up, throwing their money away at shitty puns being anti-woke when they don't even know what that means. They have no idea that the people they are supporting with shitty boomer memes are also the same people that are making their lives as shitty as their memes. They don't see beyond the culture war grandstanding to see that their rights are being stolen one by one. I pity them donating their money at bible salesmen in rich suits promising them righteousness in the form of hate for the other.

[-] subverted_per@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 year ago

I feel like you're being deliberately obtuse. You're right in that by itself trying to define the nazi party of the past in terms of present day left/right ideology is reductivist, and unproductive in discourse. But you're ignoring two important facts in the present day right/left dynamic. First that literal modern day nazis have shown a distinct preference for right wing ideaology. Second is that fascism as an ideology is a chameleon that latches onto present day conflict to unite people through oppression of a weak other, which is the basis for present day right wing policy. As such the comparison becomes apt because the fascists of the past are a model for the fascists of the present.

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subverted_per

joined 1 year ago