it's really become some nastybones business in the last couple few years. Like a totalizing thing that affects most of the things I do. In the course of writing this post I'm doing repetitions and that's just normal at this point. I frequently curate upvotes on my posts so they're not bad numbers. It's to the point where I have to go back and forth between tabs or closing and opening them to make sure it's not a bad number. It's even such that I am policing my motions with my hands so they're not bad. Even in the body of this post, I'm counting as much as I can in service of avoiding certain numbers of sentences or repetitions of words.

Anyway, how do you all experience this disease and how do you cope with it?

what're you choking down when you have to eat something to keep the pills down, and you have to take the pills

I tried taking doxycycline on an empty stomach yesterday and boy howdy, was that a bad decision – great ab workout though 😂🤢

last night, my new morning plan had been to have my Adderall when I wake up, some yogurt 2 hours later, then 2 hours later have toast and hummus or something with the doxycycline

great plan, except I don't usually eat this early, and I couldn't even get through half a cup of yogurt, which has been a lifelong safe food that I really really reeeeeally don't want to be put off

maybe skip the yogurt step and just shove a piece of bread down my throat? I already have a weird relationship with bread, I'm fine with being put off it for a while after this

on a totally unrelated note, you should definitely always wear bug repellent and check yourself for ticks when you come inside for the day

Two years ago I saw this this video about ADHD in adulthood through some post on hexbear and experienced a certain... feeling that there was puzzle piece missing to my utterly disjointed, disorganised, unmotivated life. Thank you to whoever posted that video. I owe you so much.

One and a half years ago I started going to a self help ADHD group in my town.

One year ago I got a lucky appointment by a new psychiatrist and started my diagnosis.

Two months later he confirmed my diagnosis and I got started on Elvanse (Vyvanse/Lisexamphetamine).

For the first time in my life I am not on a permanent collision course with whatever I am doing. I go to work, mostly on time and do it well. I can write an email or make an appointment without agonizing for hours. I do the dishes and clean my floor before it's disgusting. I only lost my wallet and phone once and even found them again. And I learn to structure and shape my surroundings and my schedule so that it works for me. I still fail often, but don't fall into the spiral of doom that would so often over take me, when failing before.

But the most important thing is this: I am not utterly miserable anymore when I wake up, agonizing over the day in front of me, over all the little tasks that seem insurmountable. I know it can be done, one step at a time. If not today then tomorrow.

Just had to get it out. If you wanna share or ask something about ADHD things, this could be a place.

I a long-winded way of saying “It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.”

This irks me chat. This is an elephant in the room that should be causing mass chaos

Literally every time. If its in an enviroment with people I havent spoken to about it before at least.

Hey, I'm Leyla, moderator of /c/drugs and very knowledgeable on shit people put into their bodies. Someone the other day made a post questioning if supplements actually do anything. I think this is a very good question, there's a lot of marketing BS behind vitamins and minerals, it's difficult to separate the useful from the useless (and if it's useless, it's probably harmful in some ways). While there is a lot of marketing that deludes information, some supplements and vitamins are still quite helpful and worth investing in. The ones that are worth it are normally pretty cheap too. I'll order these from most universally applicable to least universally applicable, meaning the stuff on the top will probably apply to you, while the stuff at the bottom will be for more specific issues. Obviously I'll specify the issues in the paragraphs. Also, while I will provide sources for what I say, I will say that a lot of this is lived experience.

Vitamin B12

In my opinion, Vitamin B12 is the most important thing you should go pick up. You can get a month or two's supply at the dollar store, and is the one I have personally seen make the most difference in both myself and people around me. Here's an abstract that mentions the side effects of B12 deficiency. To put it into more understandable words, B12 deficiency is known to cause

• Apathy/Depression

• Irritability

• Dissociation

• Insomnia

• Low energy

• Visual and auditory hallucinations

• Paranoid delusions

• Failing memory

• There's also evidence that people with proper B12 supply in their body have lower rates of Alzheimers.

B12 deficiency has REALLY major side effects. This is especially true if you're a drinker or drug user, as most drugs (alcohol is a drug) run through B12 like crazy. However I know someone who is on the spectrum and fully straight edge (no drugs or alcohol besides caffeine pills), whose entire life and personality turned around after getting on B12. To be clear, I'm NOT saying B12 deficiency is sole cause of your issues in neurodivergence, but what I am saying is that B12 deficiency is enough to make those issues feel impossible to work through. Taking B12 regularly has reduced the amount I dissociate, I have way more energy and focus throughout the day, and my symptoms of schizophrenia have greatly improved. B12 didn't "cure" me being schizophrenic and autistic, I am who I am. But the effects of B12 deficiency were definitely weighing on me before I got back on it. If you only decide to pick up one thing from this guide, it should be this.

Edit: @LaGG_3@hexbear.net left a comment suggesting that vegans take extra care to take B12, as the diet is apparently low in B12. I'm not vegan so I can't speak from personal experience, but everything I look into seems to support this claim. If you question if you should take B12, the answer is you probably should. Worse case scenario, you just piss it out. Like I said, this isn't going to cure your depression and dissociation, but if you're struggling with those B12 certainly won't hurt.

@ReadFanon@hexbear.net wanted to add that if you're a whippit (nitrous) person, you extra need to be taking this or risk giving yourself MS via B12 deficiency. Seriously, drugs/alcohol users, take B12. I'm going back and adding this into every harm reduction guide I write because it's that important.

Magnesium

This is another one that's fairly cheap if you get the right one. Magnesium Oxide is dirt cheap and can be found at most dollar stores. If not, it's usually around $4 at grocery store pharmacies. Here's an NIH link on magnesium. To summarize the important parts of the link, magnesium deficiency is particularly common amongst

• People with GI issues like Chron's or Celiacs (high comorbidity with neurodivergence)
• People with diabetes
• People who are chronic drinkers/drug users
• Old people

The effects of magnesium deficiency are much less major than B12 deficiency, but still affect neurodivergent folk quite a bit. Chronic magnesium deficiency can cause major issues, but for the most part magnesium deficiency just makes you feel a baseline of sick with symptoms such as nausea/vomiting, and muscle weakness/fatigue. Full list of possible symptoms are as followed, with some marked as only being chronic issues

• Nausea and vomiting
• Low apetite
• Muscle tension and weakness
• Hypertension (high blood pressure, chronic issue)
• People with chronically low magnesium have a higher rate of developing type 2 diabetes
• People with migraine issues will have their issues made worse by magnesium deficiency

This isn't going to help mental issues directly, but it will help deal with physical symptoms that contribute to issues such as anxiety or irritability. The best thing I've learned going to AA meetings is ASPHALT (Anxious, stimulated, pain, hungry, angry, lonely, tired), an abbreviation that helps to check in on your physical and mental needs before you make any decisions. Magnesium helps quite a bit with the physical side of that list, it's also a CNS depressant so it can also help with anxiety, albeit not a silver bullet. Overall, if you're dealing with a lot of physical symptoms of anxiety such as a weak stomach or being shaky all the time, you should try magnesium.

One thing I will add to this is that other forms of magnesium are worth looking into. Personally, I prefer magnesium citrate, it seems to do better as a muscle relaxer. My B12 friend from the previous section loves magnesium taurate and vouches for that. Oxide is the cheapest pills you can get, but if you're really strapped for cash, I still haven't found a reason that unflavored/unscented epsom salt (straight magnesium) can't just be eaten. Edit: @ReadFanon@hexbear.net also wanted to mention that if you buy from local shops, you can buy the food grade stuff for real cheap, and that's safer than buying stuff for baths.

Vitamin D

The sun vitamin! Honestly we're on Hexbear, I could put this at the top of the list because of how little some of us go outside lol. Personally, I actually get very little from Vitamin D, but I know people that it did work quite well for. I'm probably able to absorb enough Vitamin D through the sun, but as I'll go into in the edit section, I'm not the rule. Vitamin D deficiency is known to cause

• Depression
• Fatigue
• Bone pain
• Muscle weakness/cramps

Most people I see taking Vitamin D are doing so as a supplement for depression, and I've seen it work for a few. Now personally? I still needed to get on an SSRI for my own mental health, it wasn't a silver bullet for depression. However, I did find that it helped quite a bit with fatigue and bone pain. Temporarily taking Vitamin D until I had the energy to go touch grass and get sunlight was helpful. This is one that I consider less important, but it certainly didn't hurt anything when I picked it up. The only reason I'm ranking it higher than some of the other solutions I'm about to list is because it's cheaper, and I've seen more testimony supporting it than other solutions

EDIT: @ReadFanon@hexbear.net has posted new information that makes part of what I said about Vitamin D inaccurate. Originally, I said if you get enough sun light during the day, you're probably fine, but ReadFanon provided an article that puts that into question. Like I said, I try to keep my posts as focused on my personal experience as possible, but I'm totally open to evidence that I'm wrong and will update my post accordingly. If you suffer from any of these symptoms, Vitamin D is cheap and worth giving a shot

Their specific comment because it's worth adding

I'm going to be a dissenting opinion on this based on this study and because it's my pet theory that the RDI for Vitamin D is lower than it should be.

If you're on a restricted diet/veg and you don't get a daily intake of Vitamin D rich/fortified foods then I'd strongly encourage you to consider supplementing this. Also kids - if you have kids then please supplement their Vitamin D intake because essentially it's understood that a lack of Vitamin D especially during childhood development is a major factor for developing multiple sclerosis later in life. A few dollars of prevention can save a ton of complications down the track.

L-theanine

This is the first weird one on this list, but I'm sure that the L-theanine users on this board can chime in and support it. L-theanine is the closest thing you can get to an anti-anxiety over the counter. This is the most expensive supplement on this list so far, but it's one that I can wholeheartedly recommend. It doesn't get you high, it just makes you less anxious and more relaxed. It's one of amino acids found in teas that make tea such a calming thing. If you're already a daily tea drinker, getting L-theanine might be redundant, but I personally prefer getting my L-theanine without caffeine. It's also helpful for sleep.

Edit: @Assian_Candor@hexbear.net gave some good advice on L-theanine, specifically on mixing it with caffeine. Comrade specifically suggests

Humble caffeine is missing from your list and is probably the most powerful OTC nootropic out there and has been a godsend for dealing with undiagnosed ADHD (one of these days I will work up the will to fill out the paperwork for testing .. I swear). Particularly when stacked with l-theanine at 1:2, which gives all the focus with none of the jitters. I would recommend taking l theanine standalone any time caffeine is ingested. If you have morning coffee and road rage on the way to work this advice is tailor made for you. 100/200 Combo pills are available out there for around 30c per dose

NAC

NAC is my most loaded suggestion here. For example, if you're a heavy drinker, don't even bother with it, it can make alcohol worse on your liver. But as someone who self medicated my neurodivergent traits with alcohol, downers, and cigs for a long time, NAC is insanely helpful for being off them. First off since I mentioned it, it helps quite a bit with the voice of addiction for cigs, alcohol and gabapentinoids. I don't find it helpful for other vices, but it's life saving for those addictions. It also helps quite a bit with my nail biting. NAC is chemically the closest thing to an actual downer on this list. It works to regulate glutemate (one of the downer parts of your brain) production by helping create other amino acids in your body that regulate it. This is especially good if you're recovering from long term downer use, such as getting off benzodiazapines or gabapentinoids. However, there is evidence that it's also helpful to people with schizophrenia and OCD separate from any previous drug use. If you self medicate with downers, I would definitely recommend doing more research into NAC, or you can leave a comment here with a question about it and I'll research it for you.

Conclusion

As always with my posts like these, if you have any questions, leave them in the comments. If I know the answer, I'll respond as soon as I see it, if I don't know the answer I'll research it and give you some sources to go along with it. I generally try to stick with my lived experience for answers though. There are a lot of supplements that are BS, and there are probably more that help that I didn't put in this list, so if you have anything you'd add, comment it and I'll edit the post to add it in <3

This can absolutely be done!

I'd strongly encourage people to veer towards Epsom salts that you buy from a homebrew shop or for tofu making as these will definitely be unscented but more importantly they will be food grade by necessity. I can get 9oz of food grade magnesium for $4 here and everything is expensive where I live. Sure I can get lower grade magnesium for $1.50/9oz but 250g (9oz) goes a long way when you're probably taking less than 0.5g a day; a 250g supply will last you in the vicinity of two years. Best to spend an extra couple of dollars here if you can spare it.

alt-text for thumbnail in case it embeds: it is an image of a queer flag with an infinity symbol, on a drawn wooden background with the words “autistic people mistaken for AI” on it

I keep getting TikTok ads and whenever I see the shop logo in the corner or “sponsored” I scroll away. They claim to help AuDHD but I have no idea what to trust.

I’m curious about mushrooms, lions mane or whatever, and microdosing hallucinogens.

As an AuDHD perfectionist I’ve never valued rest that much. I feel like I should be doing something interesting and being sedentary is bad for you. Recently I have realized the importance of resting as I have been exhausted by external demands and stimuli. I am at the point where even mostly lying around in my room all day, small demands and noises are too much. All I am able to really do is hyperfocus on my phone or maybe half attentively read. I know people can spend days in bed recovering from life, but I don’t have that time. I value this time not doing anything, but I’m afraid if I don’t get active or something I will have trouble falling asleep later. I know staying in your bed while awake disassociates it from getting ready to sleep so I have been lying elsewhere. Any tips? I have been eating. Are there comfy headphones that actually kill all the sound? Bc my ears do not want to process anything anymore.

And it has all kinds of implications and context and shit.

How the fuck am I supposed to tell what's just people doing things at random and what's a part of all-singing-all-dancing-shit-show the neurotypicals call "social norms"? Down with NTs.

Honestly while it's really fucking annoying that refusal to participate could result in some silly neuronormo interpreting a completely innocuous action as an offense, and it can cut you off from social shit, I think it's basically the only way. The same button never does the same thing twice. Screeching rn.

It’s just really really hard for me to accept I guess, but that quality is super important in climbing the fascist corporate ladder. Missed out a spot in the social hierarchy with my mega social awkwardness though

But yeah, preaching to the choir, but the higher you climb in corporate America, the less value you produce and the more you get paid.

Maybe we should skip unions and fast forward to finding like-minded people for well-regulated militias. Death to America

I am a lazy failure who can't do anything. Basic shit I consistently just... don't do. Its embarrassing. I don't even want to list all of it. I have hobby stuff I've wanted to for years that I've just never gotten set up. Homework? More like I'm not fucking doing that. I've been wanting to take steps for months to get myself on hormones and get clothes but have I done them? No? Of course not, because I'm fucking lazy. All I do is rot. Its been this way for a long time, I can't even remember when the last time I didn't struggle with this. And it doesn't feel like its getting better. If it really is my autism I'm not sure how it ever can get better.

alt-text for thumbnail since it embeds: it is an image of the autistic flag with an infinity symbol and multiple colored bars (i have a hard time telling them apart), on a drawn wooden background with the words "aspergers is abeist" on it

When I was a child, autism didn't exist. Obviously it did, but it wasn't in the DSM then. It was a fringe diagnosis.

I sometimes wonder what my life would be like if I'd known early on that I want to crank out spreadsheets for 8 hours a day—for fun.

Anyway, I hope you folks get dealt a better hand than me, now that our condition is real and acknowledged.

I’ve seen it referenced on TikTok but I’m curious about the evidence. It seems pretty plausible. The same gene is involved apparently. There’s very high “comorbidity.” Even in non “AuDHDers” many of the symptoms of one (that an individual “doesn’t have”) are present. Autists can be very different from eachother and it seems like they may sometimes have more in common with some ADHDers than eachother. Dividing things into specific labels like this is kinda lib and undialectical anyway. People already realizing Aspergers and other things were just autism. “Pathological Defiant Disorder” (allegedly) seems to basically just be a common presentation of AuDHD. There’s also the monotropism theory that both tend to be high in.

This is just my uneducated opinion on something I’ve been fixated on and pondering for a little while. I’m curious if anyone has any serious evidence or more interesting thoughts. There’s probably also connections to other neurodivergences.

Here's the talk if anyone is curious

i live with my parents right now, and i often have thoughts that they are tired of me and going to have me killed or something.

my mom tells me she loves me all the time but i always feel like theres some secret resentment that im still around.

idk i just wish i wasnt so scared all the time.

it sucks living like this

This is a belated follow-up to a post from several months ago.

TL;DR: New restrictions on controlled medications require that patients use a pharmacy within a few miles of their prescribing physician, and my psychiatrist is two hours away. Many comrades suggested looking into online pharmacies.

Developments

I called three online pharmacies and inquired if they could fill controlled prescriptions. They all said yes!

However...

None take patients without health insurance!

And so, my routine continues. I'm going to the pharmacy tomorrow. If I leave by 8 AM tomorrow I should be back in time for afternoon classes.

My Refill Workflow

1. Leave a voicemail with my physician's clinic requesting a refill

2. Pharmacy never automatically fills it, so I have to follow up.

3. Call pharmacy. Robot says

Hi. What can I do for you? :blob-no-thoughts:

I'm inquiring about my prescription's status.

Okay, I can help you with that! Please say or enter your prescription number. :blob-no-thoughts:

As a matter of fact, I don't have it because controlled substances cannot be refilled and thusly every dispensation requires a new, unique prescription number which I have literally no way of knowing until I receive it. :morshupls:

I'm sorry, I didn't quite get that. Please say or enter your prescription number. :blob-no-thoughts:

I don't have it.

What can I do for you? You can say things like: "what are the pharmacy hours", or "refill a prescription" :blob-no-thoughts:

Motherfucker, if you don't put me on the phone with a person RIGHT NOW I will crawl through this goddamn telephone wire and SHOVE your stupid-ass code through your interface!

Okay. I'll get you to someone. :blob-no-thoughts:

Hello, mister pharmacy tech, sir. Can I pick up my prescription tomorrow morning?

I don't see any prescriptions here... Wait! Oh, it looks like there is a problem with your prescriber's DEA number.

Yeah, that sounds right. The very same thing the last five times, too. The head pharmacist should be able to straighten it up.

Okay. Check back this afternoon.

4. Call pharmacy again for Follow-Up: Round Two. Repeat the locution with the bot to speak to a pharmacist who confirms it's ready.

5. Drive a zillion miles and pick it up.

God Bless America

I have trouble telling what the pain in my stomach is telling me, so I pretty much only just realized how bad my body hates certain sensory and social stuff. It’s as though my insides were on fire and the only way to slightly affect it is to cry (and obvi get away from the noise). I thought it was just anxiety or under stimulation before, but no, those are separate things. I have spent hours today doing various self care type stuff (meditation, being in nature, exercising, mindfully eating, yoga nitra, massage, taking a bath, fun things on the internet, positive stimulus of other sorts, zoning out), and the feeling’s still there. I don’t even mask. How do you deal with having to be in a sensory hell for hours of the day? How do you calm down? Please don’t say drugs.

Context: ADHD often makes people struggle with interoception and being able to relax.

Posts:

• Advice on how to prepare for seeking an ADHD diagnosis
• There are two wolves inside you: a description of co-occuring ADHD & autism from an auDHDer
• Being nonverbal is a permanent condition, selective mutism is not
• Ranting about Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria and ADHD
• When PTSD feels like ADHD • a comparison between the symptoms of PTSD and common ADHD traits
• Suggestions for replacing ableist words

Comments:

• "Welcome to the neurodivergent club - we're glad you could finally make it!"
      Also comments regarding autism co-occuring with OCD ^
• All the things I wish someone had told me when I started on stimulant meds
• Tolerance to ADHD meds
• A barebones/scrappy comment on autistic burnout and catatonia
• CW! Child abuse and masking autism: Similarities, co-occurrence, and support networks
• Allistic ritual for beginning interactions in social places
• Recommendations for messaging
• Replies to "What is ADHD medication supposed to feel like"
• Forming relationships
• I don't know how to name this
• Sleep hygiene/Sensory diet (stims)
• Organising your ADHD life
• "General advice for note taking and task management in a system that I've developed"
• Misophonia
• Moving out as an autist

If anybody has better summaries for the comments, do post them.

"I'm pretty sure I have the chronic procrastination disorder but I don't know why I've spent so much time procrastinating about seeking a diagnosis for it."

I feel obligated by my username to mention that Frantz Fanon was influential on the Palestinian liberation movements. The Wretched of the Earth is his most important work in this regard.

I'd strongly recommend giving that book a read.

Idk if this is common it happens to me a lot.

Timing the start of something is not a simple process. Punishing people for being late disproportionately impacts poor and disabled people. Not all of us can drive a car or even have a car to drive. We might have to wait on other people, or use public transportation, and the more steps we add to the process the more likely something is to go wrong. Punishing people for being late is systematic oppression towards these groups. This punishment can include starting without people, especially if that itself is framed as a punishment.

“Let the late ones be late and miss out (they can read the minutes), and reward the prompt ones by not wasting their time”

From the rusty's rules of order, something the IWW uses to organize. They are ableist.

On the other hand, waiting too long to start can impact people with limited time or energy. Not everyone can stay awake an extra hour just to wait for something to start.

This means that there is not one singular solution for how to start things (although obviously don’t do punishment). In small groups the best solution is to talk things over with everyone and get an idea for what everyone wants to happen, what can go wrong, and plans to mitigate any potential issues. If public transportation is running late, maybe someone with a car can go pick you up.

For large groups, most things do not need a strict starting time. If it is a large group and it requires strict attendance then you brought hierarchy into it long ago and ableism and such was always the conclusion you were going to get anyways.

I'll get this out of the way at the start, there's a good chance its just other things I'm dealing with. I'm autistic, and have semi recently figured out I'm trans. Those changes have made me a little less stable feeling. CW for the rest of this post for talking about many sad things, although I do not feel sad right now.