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What made you pick the Lemmy server you are on?
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I tried to find a server that isn't blocking anyone, and hasn't been defederated by any of the big servers.
I want to avoid an echo-chamber and have access to everything on the fediverse, including stuff I find distateful. If anything really bothers me I will block the community/instance myself, I don't want others making that choice for me.
Unfortunately there seems to be a lot of folks out there just searching for an excuse to clutch their pearls, rile up a mob, and defederate anything and everything that offends them.
I don't want to circlejerk in a safe space echo chamber, I want to see both the yin and the yang of humanity. I want that wild west feeling of the internet of old
I shall inform you of a secret. There are some big servers around that don't defederate anything and aren't defederated by anyone. :) that's all I'm saying, it's up to you to find the treasure.
Is there any way to see who is federated/defederated, and from whom?
I made a tool just for that: https://federation-checker.vercel.app/
This uses two things: https://fba.ryona.agency/?domain=lemm.ee and https://lemm.ee/instances (do replace "lemm.ee" with whichever instance you want to check)
My tool is bugged, and lemm.ee does defederate instances, so be aware of that and maybe use what my tool uses instead of my tool if you want reliable output :)