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Do some guys start humming/making noise around women to not frighten them? (lemmy.world)

submitted 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) by taxiiiii@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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Might sound silly, but every once in a while, random guys around me (pretty short, female) start humming/making random noises when they get near me, usually when I'm alone. Imagine me standing at a red traffic light at night or something. It's never women. Sometimes, it's some creep trying to get my attention, though that's usually kinda obvious.

But I also had it happen with guys who didn't seem like they wanted anything. I lowkey suspect that some might make noises so that I'm not caught off guard or something?

Any men on here who do this? Or am I just tripping?

Edit to summarize: So, a few guys apparently do it on purpose, while others think they might do it subconsciously. Some do it around women, others around whomever, since anyone can get scared. Super interesting.

Also, when I spoke of creeps, I meant actual assholes who did and said shitty stuff, not random socially awkward people. You know the drill.

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[-] InEnduringGrowStrong@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 days ago

IDK, maybe, I might be one of those guys and didn't really notice before.
I don't believe I do this differently around women vs men.
I'm often too busy in my own head to pay much attention. So, if your body language isn't sketchy like drunk or overly aggressive, odds are I've zoned out and you didn't register much.

Anyway, I'm a generally silent walker.
If I'm not paying attention, I might end up sneaking up on someone without meaning to, which can then startle them or spook them. Like, I spook my cat often enough and they're the actual predators.

But yea, late at night, I think I might subconsciously make myself known ahead of time just as a simple courtesy.
I'd rather not find out whether anyone's more of a fight/flight person when they finally notice me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Me? I'm the throat clearing guy. Hi. Ahem.

PS: I have 20+ years experience of throat clearing. Yes I've seen doctors, they didn't find anything other than yea we can see inflammation in your vocal chords, no there's nothing we can do, just stop doing it. That or prescribe random shit that actually fucks up other basic bodily functions and create actual problems.

Anyway, I'm sorry if it's weird.

[-] taxiiiii@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

It's not weird at all. Just didn't register with me before that there might be multiple reasons why people do it.

For context: I happen to look very nonthreatening. Literally no one is scared of me, ever. For better or for worse. That doesn't even apply to most women, I'd say. So, if I'm not consciously thinking about it or someone tells me, I won't notice details like that. It's honestly good to know.

this post was submitted on 30 Mar 2025

114 points (92.5% liked)

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