I wish I had this kind of thing figured out. There is a "side" of me where I go by my instincts, and people criticize me for it, saying it is inconsiderate to how perspective works (because they say they aren't seeing any acknowledgement, and this is related to a lot of the dark triad accusations I get). Sometimes (especially in the context of what people might call my anhedonia) I might shut all that down and out inside me (constituting another "side") and do things completely based in cold hard analysis, such as with the code of honor system I showed you that one time, and people say it comes off as too robotic and "recklessly inhuman". And sometimes, like here, one might find a third "side", one where I can be found asking people for their input and not reflecting on my own, which has to do with what you have seen here, and people accuse me of being a weak enough decision-maker to potentially go back to those dark triad accusations. People even pejoratively/derogatively call these "[Leni's] tripartite autism" (as well as claiming it reflects duplicity like anything is of a concealing nature). And then there's a fourth "side" which has me trying to be an "opportunist" about things, especially as an alternative to being objecting to so much that I experience, and people flip, calling it "manipulative" to make lemonade when life gives you lemons. If you have a secret to your success with people, I'd love to know it.