It seems like a lot of people are really quick to forget what the "rat race" is/was like AND many of them over estimate how well they handled it when they were in it. Unfortunately, my dad is one of the worst offenders so I have to deal with that kind of negativity more often than I'd like.

For my personal situation, it often helps to push back on the most egregious manipulation. When I was younger and more naive, I would let things go with no push back, and all the happened is the guilt trips became more frequent and more hostile. Once I started calling it out and correcting the details, it happened considerably less and I'm pretty sure he's more apt to think twice before bringing those types of things up in front of me (though I know he still does it behind my back).

For example, I will remind my dad about things like "it was easier for you to visit your parents every week because they lived in the same town and not 2 hours away like you and I currently do" or "you were in your 20s and early 30s when you did this and that, but when you were my current age, you definitely didn't have the time or energy for it". Usually he'll concede, at least for the moment.