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this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2025
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This is particularly poignant as an autistic person. Being told to calm down when there's fucking nuclear reaction levels of anxiety going on in your brain is a level of condescension that would set off even the calmest motherfucker on the planet if they could experience this for even 5 fucking seconds.
I'm not a woman, but I can at least partially relate to how awful it is to be told to calm down. Shit suuuuuuuucks.
I'm a dude and being told to calm down seems like the male equivalent of calling someone hysterical. I have only ever seen someone told to calm down when the person is being calm, but doesn't like something and might be making a face. It is a condescending denial of emotion just like telling someone not to get upset before giving them bad news.
Just let me get upset and verbally express my frustration or disappointment!