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Personally, I think all of this "Person X holds an officially wrong viewpoint on this one singular issue, so let's attack them and create as much division as possible and take energy away from defending ourselves against people who hold objectively wrong and dangerous viewpoints on 100% of the issues and are actively trying to destroy us" thing is silly. But that is me.
The Lemmy devs are a little bit unusual in that I have problems with their overall politics (even if we actually agree on more than we disagree, probably), not just a one issue. But even in that case, where it's a sizeable difference of opinion (instead of WE CAUGHT THEM BEING BAD ON THIS ONE ISSUE FUCK EM FUCK EM FUCK EM), I don't think should be a reason to "divide" from them. People are allowed to hold viewpoints, even allowed to contribute while holding those viewpoints, even if I think they are wrong.
I feel like this is the best approach. An ally is an ally. If they have weird, socially unacceptable, or poorly thought out ideas, but they
then they're fine for the stuff we care about. The right has built a big tent because they understand this. We're only holding ourselves back by subjecting each other to purity tests.
As always, there are limits, but generally we need to build more coalitions.