I've been doubting my sexuality lately and I freaked out when Google recommended an ad with LGBT couple on it. Not even my friends or family know that side of me.
I can understand being freaked out by that for sure. Think of it like this, you might like similar artists and articles that LGBT folks like. Maybe you click on more links on stories that affect LGBT folks. But also, lots of ads have LGBT couples nowadays, it's what gets the red hats so upset. Either way, it's nothing to be ashamed or worried about, and there's at least a chance that you took something to be more deeply targeted at you than it really was. Chin up there, yeah?
What really upset me though was the privacy aspect of it. Imagine your friend wants to show you a meme or something, and you suddenly see an ad with an LGBT couple on it on his/her phone. If that was me I would immediately think they're being targeted with that ad for a reason. And like, I don't have a problem being part of the LGBT community, but this thing could out me to everyone without me being ready you know?
What if I want to play a YouTube video for my family and I get a targeted recommendation? That would be a problem for me.
I do totally understand that, and that must've been jarring and anxiety inducing. What I was trying to convey is that straight folks get those ads too but I don't meant to downplay the emotional disturbance of it all whatsoever, just help ease your mind now.
I'm going to push back against everyone saying that the algorithm knows. While not unthinkable, I believe it is much more likely that it is a coincidence, and what you're experiencing is called the frequency illusion. Simply because your sexuality has been on your mind lately, you're more likely to notice things that remind you of it - not because those things are more prevalent but simply because you, subconsciously, pay more attention to them.
That said, privacy is important and you should definitely try to maintain it - e.g. use a private browser window in a fresh browser instance to research things related to sexuality.
I wouldn't underestimate it. I also wouldn't buy into the "I have nothing to hide" narrative. It's not about hiding or not hiding. The fallout from the Dobbs decision is a great example of why, if you aren't concerned with privacy now, then you will be in the future. All of a sudden, the right of 51% of the population to make decisions about their own bodies was suddenly gone, and handed over to state governments. The day before that decision, people needing abortions and the doctors who provide them had "nothing to hide." The day after? They're suddenly criminals. Their social media can be monitored. Their online and in-person purchases. Where they travel and why. Their medical records. And maybe worst of all, their fellow Americans are offered prize money if they turn someone in so that they can be charged in criminal court.
Or what about Florida's "risk prediction" software that supposedly can predict which "at-risk" (aka non-white) kids will become criminals? Maybe I'm wrong for finding that unsettling. This is from 2015
What about social credit scores? Which we already have, we just don't get to see them (LexisNexis "risk solution" software). But sooner rather than later, every word and action will be recorded and held against us in every aspect of our lives, rather than just when applying for jobs and mortgages. And anti-discrimination laws don't do shit. They always find a work around. Although with the current supreme court I'm sure all forms of discrimination will be perfectly legal soon enough.
Btw private browsing doesn't prevent tracking. It just doesn't store anything in the broswer history.
Yeah, the Baader–Meinhof phenomenon is fascinating and something that I experience constantly. I would be surprised if that's not what's going on here. I've never experienced it for something as personal and important as doubting my sexuality though, that must be jarring as hell.
I've been doubting my sexuality lately and I freaked out when Google recommended an ad with LGBT couple on it. Not even my friends or family know that side of me.
Oh, it's been proven Google and corporate social medias (and Walmart?!?) can figure out that stuff before you do.
Sometimes avoiding the Walmartians feels worth the markup
Yes, that's the story I was thinking of.
I can understand being freaked out by that for sure. Think of it like this, you might like similar artists and articles that LGBT folks like. Maybe you click on more links on stories that affect LGBT folks. But also, lots of ads have LGBT couples nowadays, it's what gets the red hats so upset. Either way, it's nothing to be ashamed or worried about, and there's at least a chance that you took something to be more deeply targeted at you than it really was. Chin up there, yeah?
What really upset me though was the privacy aspect of it. Imagine your friend wants to show you a meme or something, and you suddenly see an ad with an LGBT couple on it on his/her phone. If that was me I would immediately think they're being targeted with that ad for a reason. And like, I don't have a problem being part of the LGBT community, but this thing could out me to everyone without me being ready you know? What if I want to play a YouTube video for my family and I get a targeted recommendation? That would be a problem for me.
I do totally understand that, and that must've been jarring and anxiety inducing. What I was trying to convey is that straight folks get those ads too but I don't meant to downplay the emotional disturbance of it all whatsoever, just help ease your mind now.
I'm going to push back against everyone saying that the algorithm knows. While not unthinkable, I believe it is much more likely that it is a coincidence, and what you're experiencing is called the frequency illusion. Simply because your sexuality has been on your mind lately, you're more likely to notice things that remind you of it - not because those things are more prevalent but simply because you, subconsciously, pay more attention to them.
That said, privacy is important and you should definitely try to maintain it - e.g. use a private browser window in a fresh browser instance to research things related to sexuality.
It's hard to believe anyone missed this:
As Pole’s computers crawled through the data, he was able to identify about 25 products that, when analyzed together, allowed him to assign each shopper a “pregnancy prediction” score. More important, he could also estimate her due date to within a small window, so Target could send coupons timed to very specific stages of her pregnancy.
This article is from 2012
I wouldn't underestimate it. I also wouldn't buy into the "I have nothing to hide" narrative. It's not about hiding or not hiding. The fallout from the Dobbs decision is a great example of why, if you aren't concerned with privacy now, then you will be in the future. All of a sudden, the right of 51% of the population to make decisions about their own bodies was suddenly gone, and handed over to state governments. The day before that decision, people needing abortions and the doctors who provide them had "nothing to hide." The day after? They're suddenly criminals. Their social media can be monitored. Their online and in-person purchases. Where they travel and why. Their medical records. And maybe worst of all, their fellow Americans are offered prize money if they turn someone in so that they can be charged in criminal court.
Or what about Florida's "risk prediction" software that supposedly can predict which "at-risk" (aka non-white) kids will become criminals? Maybe I'm wrong for finding that unsettling. This is from 2015
https://theweek.com/articles/495147/floridas-minority-report-crime-prediction-software
What about social credit scores? Which we already have, we just don't get to see them (LexisNexis "risk solution" software). But sooner rather than later, every word and action will be recorded and held against us in every aspect of our lives, rather than just when applying for jobs and mortgages. And anti-discrimination laws don't do shit. They always find a work around. Although with the current supreme court I'm sure all forms of discrimination will be perfectly legal soon enough.
Btw private browsing doesn't prevent tracking. It just doesn't store anything in the broswer history.
Yeah, the Baader–Meinhof phenomenon is fascinating and something that I experience constantly. I would be surprised if that's not what's going on here. I've never experienced it for something as personal and important as doubting my sexuality though, that must be jarring as hell.