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I think a big reason millennials seem less interested in having kids that I don't see discussed a lot: Boomers seemed to hate marriage and parenthood (hexbear.net)

submitted 1 week ago by ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

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From a pretty early age I decided I didn't want to get married or have kids cuz both my parents seemed utterly miserable. For a long time I found it weird anyone wanted to do it at all, why would you want to be trapped with someone you hate who you get into screaming arguments all the time?

And it's not just me, you see a lot of jokes online about people like playing that one scene from Marriage Story while playing old N64 games for nostalgia.

I think the experience of seeing our own parents be so miserable maybe soured a lot of us on starting families.

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[-] CatoPosting@hexbear.net 54 points 1 week ago

Ehh that's part of it maybe, but I think the main thing is no stable housing or social support networks. Also SO many more women are making the choice to stay single because they are legally able to exist without men and many men haven't risen to the challenge of being worth living with. Regardless, if the gov't offered UBI but only for people with kids, something like $1200 a month + $600 per additional child, no means testing, I think we'd see many more couples with kids.

[-] Belly_Beanis@hexbear.net 39 points 1 week ago

Also SO many more women are making the choice to stay single nevause they are legally able to exist without men

There was a user on Hexbear a few years ago who pointed this out as the main reason birth rates have declined. There's people living in worse conditions outside of the US who still have kids. Women have more options in the Imperial Core, so of course they don't want to deal with men or having health problems from giving birth or missing out on their educations/careers or a dozen other reasons. When women don't have to rely on being a mother for citizenship, of course there's a decline in marriages and birth rates!

That person got shouted down and they deleted their account. A lot of he/hims not beating the allegations. I think about that person every time this conversation comes up.

[-] into_highest_invite@lemmygrad.ml 16 points 1 week ago

hexbear in general has a problem with shouting down people who take the right position on women's issues

[-] Collatz_problem@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Socialist countries have consistently had higher birth rates than culturally similar capitalist countries. Does that mean that women in capitalist countries are freer?

[-] Tabitha@hexbear.net 34 points 1 week ago

also 90% of breadwinner jobs now have college side gig pay (at least relative to skyrocketing housing costs and other costs of living)

[-] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago

because they are legally able to exist without men and many men haven't risen to the challenge of being worth living with.

I think it's more the latter than the former. Some people stay together for financial reasons but a majority of couples get together for the wrong reasons, and make a mess out of their domestic units.

[-] CatoPosting@hexbear.net 20 points 1 week ago

I think it's both, or less boomers would've stayed with their abusive husbands. Women couldn't even have their own bank accounts till the 70s in the US. I'm not convinced men have changed, women have just realized they don't have to put up with it.