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this post was submitted on 25 Sep 2023
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Asklemmy
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I had a pretty solid career , in the Navy, and now I am an electrical engineer, with a pretty awesome family, and we own our own home.
I have two siblings.
My older brother lives in a trailer, can't keep a real job and only ever calls to ask for money.
My older sister has had six kids with four different men. I don't take her calls because she just up and abandoned four of her kids. (Then had her sixth kid with the fourth father).
I have no idea how I avoided that white trash destiny and I am racked with "survivors guilt".
Your siblings could have ADHD. Inability to keep jobs, troubles with money, early/often pregnancy, and promiscuity are all symptoms.
As the other person said, don't do this because you're wrong to say it but...
What kind of arrogant asshole diagnoses people with ADHD with absolutely zero context? You, I guess. What's the point, their lives are fucked up by their own hand whether they have ADHD or not. ADHD doesn't make someone have a bunch of kids (despite your claim, that's not how it works). ADHD doesn't make people have miserable "white trash" (per the commenter) lives. It only makes it harder to thrive.
I didn't diagnose them. I said they could have it. It makes it harder to thrive if it isn't treated. I had two important adults in my life get diagnosed recently and they are so relieved to begin understanding their executive deficits, and knowing their history it seems much clearer now why they were struggling. I only brought it up because if they are untreated, they could potentially have easier lives by finding treatment. I'm sad to see that so many people were offended by my mere suggestion that they could be affected. The disorder is hereditary, but not every relative is affected. Having ADHD doesn't make you a shitty person, but it's more likely you end up in bad situations when you have less control of yourself.
Please educate yourself more and stop believing that a condition like that makes you a bad person capable of abandoning your children and alienating your family