this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2023
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ADHD
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Bit of a tangent, not just emails, not just professionaly, but one thing I find saves me a lot of stress is that I ask less unnecessary questions.
Not: Would you like to join me / go with me and do x? You can't go on day x? What about day y?
Instead: I'm going to do X at date, location, time. If you want you can join me, let me know.
Not: Can you do X?
Instead: I would like you to do X.
Not: When will it be ready?
Instead: I'm assuming it'll be ready by X. Let me know if this is correct.
Not: What's the deadline?
Instead: I can have this done by X. Let me know if this is acceptable.
TLDR: don't ask people permission or assume they won't be ok with what you want to do. Tell them what you're doing/planning/expecting, offer them the opportunity to help/join/give input.
Bonus: makes you come across as less uncertain and saves a lot of back and forth.
I've found that some people don't respond if you ask for confirmation "will that be finished by tomorrow?". Asking in the negative allows for you to assume everything is fine unless they respond "the due date is tomorrow, please let me know if you need help to finish that on time".
Perhaps it's less polite, but if you're dealing with people who rarely reply, it puts the burden on them and doesn't leave you waiting for their reply.
Good catch. Yeah. "I'm assuming X. Let me know if this is not the case."
I love this, it's very assertive and just "live your fucking life"-ful.