I was specifically thinking of a woman who recently asked me why I wear black all the time, and when I replied "Ask Johnny Cash," she got visibly confused and said, "Oh." I'd have told her to either read the lyrics or listen to Man in Black, if she'd asked. I don't know what to do with confused disengagement.
Now I can't read body language through text but maybe she had an assumption, that got destroyed, therefore she looked confused? It doesn't mean that she didn't know the lyrics or the man. Also do you enjoy being needlessly cryptic.
I don’t know what to do with confused disengagement.
Engage by reassuring, or changing the topic? Cracking a joke? ("Also, I'm way too lazy to colour-match"). Whatever.
Neither of your "challenges" are such. I already do both things by myself. I want to improve myself, not just maintain.
What happens when you two disagree on what would actually be an improvement?
A discussion, I would imagine. That's how I deal with disagreements between myself and others .
What if you judge it as vapid because it doesn't align with what you consider valuable improvement? What if it's nigh impossible to express verbally?
...all I'm saying, basically, is that there's unknown unknowns. Too much goal focus ensures that they'll always stay that way.
I was specifically thinking of a woman who recently asked me why I wear black all the time, and when I replied "Ask Johnny Cash," she got visibly confused and said, "Oh." I'd have told her to either read the lyrics or listen to Man in Black, if she'd asked. I don't know what to do with confused disengagement.
Now I can't read body language through text but maybe she had an assumption, that got destroyed, therefore she looked confused? It doesn't mean that she didn't know the lyrics or the man. Also do you enjoy being needlessly cryptic.
Engage by reassuring, or changing the topic? Cracking a joke? ("Also, I'm way too lazy to colour-match"). Whatever.