693
"Margaret" by Jim Benton
(files.mastodon.social)
alt text
Cartoon of the Grim Reaper/Death at the door of a smiling, plump woman giving out Halloween candy. Death says:
"I'm not wearing a
costume. I'm here to
take your sou—"
The sentence breaks off when he sees what the woman gave him, then he exclaims:
"Holy Shit
full size Snickers"
He concludes:
"Nevermind
Margaret
we're good"
(alt text by @nixCraft@mastodon.social)
This gets posted every single Haloween and I'm here for it
That because he comes every year gives him full size Snickers bars. She will live forever.
No idea why she keeps getting scheduled to die on Halloween, though.
How else does Death guarantee a steady supply of full sized Snickers? The arrangement works for both of them.
Also helps kill the kids with diabetes or peanut allergies. In the long run death gets more business keeping her alive.
He could just threaten everyone he comes for to buy him some full-sized Snickers or he'll take their soul. Most would consider that a fair trade.
Oh, I'm sure that, once word gets out, everyone will have a few Snickers or similar treats to hand at all times, sort of like how spirits would be sent to the afterlife with two coins for Charon, but a bit earlier in the process.
And then for the suicidal people, he'd threaten to NOT take them if they don't buy him some Snickers.
I did a version of this during the height of the pandemic where I hung up a big old clothesline in the front yard and pinned dozens of full size bars to it. Always interesting to see which ones get taken; Twix and KitKat proved the most popular. And the line wasn't empty at night's end! Our neighborhood kids are sweet.
I always prefered Twix just because it had 2 bars in the package. Felt like I'm getting more.
Yeah, but this time it's on Lemmy!