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submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by fossilesque@mander.xyz to c/science_memes@mander.xyz

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[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 72 points 11 months ago

If some lady brought out a conversation that fucking awesome, I wouldn't want a second date either. I'd fucking propose. Well, would have. There's very little sexier than enthusiasm and a love of knowledge.

And no, not literally propose, and it would hopefully turn into a second date, but that's no fucking fun to open up with in a comment, ffs, you fucking pedant.

[-] ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 11 months ago

As a woman with that level of enthusiasm about niche science info (I got a degree as a science communicator, because I literally can’t help myself sharing interesting info when it seems a good time to do so)..

It’s very very difficult to find people who aren’t intimidated by it, or put off by the enthusiasm about something they don’t begin to understand/care about. Of all the people I talk to randomly, maybe 1 out of 30 people actually likes the enthusiasm past the first 5 min. And even that 5 min can be a stretch. That is to say, they tolerate it, they don’t tend to engage with it or encourage it. Mostly you get “oh, that’s neat”. Which is a great way to shut the entire conversation down, cuz where do you go from there?

I tend to agree that enthusiasm is interpersonally attractive, it’s why I make small talk by asking what thing the other person finds interesting that they learned recently. (Not something they think I want to know, something they are interested in). I don’t think the majority of the population views it that way, though. They only think enthusiasm is good if it’s a subject they already care about in some way. And they don’t want to share theirs in case it’s not something you are interested in, even if all you actually are interested in is whatever sparks their passion.

I guess it could be my area, but I’ve been a lot of places (mostly within the same country ofc) and found about the same whether rural or urban, north or south. Also I don’t think my observation is because I’m a woman, but it could be a contributing factor, idk.

[-] pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.cafe 1 points 11 months ago

It's not about them though, it's about you, and you can't expect science enthusiasts to submit to the will of ignorant bullies and hide who they are and what they care about to appease other people.

In fact, people like you have fallen for the ruse that science has to submit to ignorant people in hopes of convincing them to not be ignorant, and you can't see how deeply you've been manipulated. It's a power play. They do it to emotionally blackmail you into not correcting them so they can have power over the conversation.

I'll take being called a know-it-all arrogant ass than allow obviously abusive, manipulative people to push your's and society's buttons in an obvious social dominance power play so they can do and say whatever they want without any consequences.

[-] ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You misunderstand my understanding that most people don’t care, for being deterred from doing it.

No no. It’s a compulsion. I don’t have a choice but to share things, even at my own social detriment. I mean obviously I could subvert who I am fundamentally for the comfort of society, but that’s a lot of work I’m not willing to do when sharing is more fun, and more rewarding when it does hit. That’s why I got the science communication degree. To facilitate sharing whatever I know with whomever I meet in a way they can relate to. I take that skill very seriously. I was good at it before I got the degree.

I know some people stop sharing when beaten down by society, but I’m not one. When things get awkward I say “my bad I’m a science communicator by trait and training and have trouble not sharing cool stuff as a result” to diffuse the social pressure to conform. It works well enough.

It makes building real relationships more challenging than I assume your average individual has, but the connections that are made under those conditions tend to be really good ones so tradeoff I guess.

[-] pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.cafe 1 points 11 months ago

Okay, you've got the right spirit. Just wanted to be clear.

Most American intellectuals are beaten down through years of emotional manipulation and abuse they're never educated on the true nature of, both because most people don't truly understand it and those that do don't want others to so they can't be stopped.

[-] ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 11 months ago

All good friend. I wouldn’t call myself an intellectual, though… I’m just a person with specific interests like everyone else. Separating people by, essentially, educational attainment.. is a mistake. I barely learned shit in college, I just got a piece of paper saying I was good at what I was already good at so I could get a job (which I haven’t yet, and it’s been a solid while becaue corporate bs is bs and heaven forbid you have gaps! but I can tell people what my degree is for and that’s enough for conversation).

My life has been a series of traumatic events that forcibly removed most of my blinders, and I see things as clearly as anyone really can, washed with propaganda as we all are.. and it’s fucking miserable enough to wish I was entirely ignorant. So much easier.

But the rock has been the scientific method, it’s an amazing thing that gives us the tools to share things confidently! And I love telling people about the most recent thing I learned that was based on it. It is so helpful to say “hey what about this cool thing!” And when they go “hmm idk” you can describe the study and results, like being a living scicomm book, and then show them the actual study.