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this post was submitted on 06 Dec 2023
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I was up for confirmation, when allegedly the Holy Spirit enters you and you start a more adult phase relationship with God. Post-ceremony, the prep class teacher asked all of us newly confirmed kids if we had felt the holy Spirit enter us. Every single kid but me said yes. It was obvious to me that they were being influenced by each other and the encouragement of the teacher and the specialness of the ceremony. Realizing I didn't want to be carried away by the wave of group fuzzies was the start of my drifting from the church.
And then the firm end to it all was when I left home and got away from the network of religious friends and family I grew up around and really saw how the church treats gay people and women and children.
When I was doing my sunday school classes getting ready for confirmation, I remember thinking, what if I don't want to be confirmed? What if I get up there and just say no? I didn't do that cause my parents obviously pressured me into religion in the first place, but that's definitely the first time I realized it just wasn't for me. Took me until college to convince my family I wasnt going to church with them anymore.
Im not a religious bashing person, but you just have to be blind to so many contradictions and horrible events to stay sane and believe it's all for a better reason and that there is a higher power orchestrating it all. Props to those people cause I just can't do it.