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What's something you used to do/see/say but don't anymore because you don't feel it's right? (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago by T0rrent01@lemmy.world to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world

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Me personally? I've become much less tolerant of sexist humor. Back in the day, cracking a joke at women's expense was pretty common when I was a teen. As I've matured and become aware to the horrific extent of toxicity and bigotry pervading all tiers of our individualistic society, I've come to see how exclusionarly and objectifying that sort of 'humor' really is, and I regret it deeply.

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[-] Calamades@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 1 year ago

I've been trying to degender my language. I grew up saying "thank you (or excuse me, yes/no, etc) sir/ma'am" and then being in customer facing positions for years just absolutely cemented that in my mind to the point where it is an absolute knee jerk reaction to make assumptions about the gender of others. It's an awful habit and makes me cringe every time I do it. I try to either just avoid the gender identifier ("thank you.") which to my mind sounds impolite, or use gender neutral terms like "friend" which REALLY sound impolite. It's tough but I'm working on it! The real trouble is getting my brain to stop gendering others and as a quite elderly millenial who actually identifies as Agender it is an annoying and difficult task. I'm envious of younger folks who won't grow up with these kinds of ideas as a default.

[-] madcaesar@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

You know we've gone too far when people feel bad for saying thank you sir/mam...

[-] T0rrent01@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

Not all people identify with the two-gender labels. For instance, I'm genderqueer, and I'd feel very dysphoric if someone told me "ma'am."

[-] RoquetteQueen@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 year ago

I'm a cis lady and I don't like being called ma'am. It feels so forced and phony.

[-] Thebazilly@pathfinder.social 6 points 1 year ago

I mentioned it to my mom the first time I got "ma'am"ed. I'm a cis woman and I hated it! Mom, who looks much more ma'am-worthy than I, said the same thing. I don't know if anyone wants to be a "ma'am."

[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

I don't care one way or the other as long as it's an attempt at politeness. It's fine.

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this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023

582 points (92.1% liked)

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